#harry potter song fic

[kippipies]

And I just can try to face The dark inside my head

[ccelicaa]

their first meeting was in the bathroom

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A moment I drew from my fic!! You can read it here!

---------------------------------------------------- and a little doodle I made that pretty much explains it.

[cursedmoon-doll13]

If It Serves You.

(Headmaster!Severus Snape x Reader)

Cw: Non/Dubcon + Aftermath, Afab Reader, Dark-ish Snape, Unprotected Sex, Powerplay, Sex as Bargaining, Facefucking, Crying, Fingering, Creampie, Begging, Degradation (use of slut) and Praise, Reader calls Snape ‘Headmaster,’ Former Student Reader, Mentions of Torture/Child Abuse, Denial of Feelings.

READ WITH CAUTION

Word Count: 3.7k

Summary: As a professor of Hogwarts, your past ambitions, your fragile hope and unrelenting diligence have all led to nothing. Now, you are powerless beneath the rising force of He Who Must Not Be Named and his army of Death Eaters. The only thing left you have to give is your pride; your weak and vulnerable body.

Or, you beg the new headmaster to show mercy to your students in exchange for sexual favours.

Dividers by @/saradika

Of course, there was no pressing need to check and recheck the potions’ storage. Certainly no need to catalogue it twice. You did almost it out of instinct, or force of habit. Yes, It’s healthy to maintain a routine, including routine inspections, just like- just like-

“Professor ___,” comes a gruff voice from behind. In your nervous state, you imagine it is a Carrow, and freeze in panic. “Why are you here?”

You whirl around. No. It’s Professor Slughorn.

“Oh,” you straighten your robes. “Horace. I was just taking inventory.”

“Were you? I’m perfectly capable of doing it myself.” He says brusquely.

“Of course, of course you can.”

Your voice carries the same placid, appealing tone with which you’ve used to calm your pupils. You wince at the sound of it. Then, his expression loosens. Not immediately, but little by little, settling into the creases and wrinkles of stress and age. His walrus moustache droops into a familiar frown.

“I’m… I’m very sorry, ___,” he says. “Whenever I leave my storage unattended for too long, I take this terrible notion that some very bright and brilliant student is going to brew a polyjuice potion. Heh.”

His laughter rings rather hollow.

“Yes, those were my thoughts exactly,” you concede, heaving a sigh. “It would be so simple. Not for all of them, but some of our best could do it. And then they would make a reckless attempt at escaping, or even try to impersonate one of those Death…”

You stop yourself, and peer carefully into his face.

You’ve noticed how Horace has visibly deflated, how he has lost his colour over the past few months. How could you not? You would never accuse the Slug of being slovenly, but you’re well aware that beneath all the powder his eye-bags are as sunken as yours.

“It is unfortunate that one of my… One of our best…” It seems that he cannot finish his sentence. Nonetheless, you know who she is.

“It’s a very unfortunate thing,” Professor Slughorn mutters idly. “Very unfortunate…”

He’s fiddling with a ring on one liver-spotted finger. His lips purse periodically, as if a throb in his temple is threatening to burst.

“Horace, It’ll all be alright,” you try to reassure him, knowing you cannot guarantee this.

The only response you receive is a distant nod. He does not stop fussing over his ring. Then, he turns abruptly stony again:

“Well, then,” he says. “You’d best be on your way.”

He dismisses you as curtly as he would a student, but you don’t protest. You know that when you leave, he will pacify his anxiety with a sleeping draught.

As you exit the dungeon and traverse the silent halls, the early winter chill rattles straight through your bones. It seems that Hogwarts grows colder each passing day; colder and emptier. Even when teaching, your classroom is as quiet as death.

Alchemy has never been a popular elective, and now you are down to very few students. Some had also disappeared completely over the Summer, mostly those without Pureblood status or families to support them… You try not to ponder too deeply on it. For their sake - and perhaps also for your own - you keep it together.

Yes. You must stay stubborn and strong. Especially considering what you are about to do now.

You shiver in your thin robes outside of the Headmaster’s office. The griffin sentinel glares haughtily down at you, and for a second you fancy it alive, judging you guilty for some crime. Thinking this, You glance this way and that, wary of onlookers. 

But all of the students are asleep; or at least, they should be. Most of your coworkers have also retired for the evening. You here stand alone. 

You take a deep, shuddering breath. 

“Sugar Quill.” Your voice echoes eerily. 

The griffin does not budge. The new headmaster has changed the password, of course. You suspected as much, but it was still worth attempting.  

“Amortentia,” you try next. No response. 

You shift, acutely aware of how ridiculous you must appear; a Hogwarts professor stumped by a statue. 

“Polyjuice. Veritaserum. Bezoar… Asphodel.” 

Nothing. 

“Oh, for Merlin’s sake,” you huff, already spiked with tight, uneasy tension. “It was so much easier when Dumbledore…”

A low, heavy rumble breaks your train of thought as the spiral staircase emerges. You quickly mount it and climb upwards, boots clattering on the rising stone. It gives way to a large study lined with bookshelves.

You’ve made it into Dumbledore’s office. 

Except it is no longer his. You must remind yourself of this fact often, and each time it stings, like a tiny pricking thorn ingrown into the heart. The study is far draughtier than you remember; devoid and bereft in the absence of Fawkes.

No, Albus is not here. Instead, what scowls over at you from behind the Headmaster’s desk is the unmistakable face of Severus Snape, and he does not appear pleased to see you.

“Kindly inform me why you are in my office.” His voice is slow and measured, but you can sense the venom lurking underneath. 

“I don’t remember ever giving you the password,” he continues, alighting from his chair. “Or have you picked up that nasty eavesdropping habit from one of our pupils?” 

He spat that last word as if it was a curse. 

“No, Severus,” you say quickly. “I guessed it.” 

Severus. Or Professor Snape. But now…

You think you catch him pale ever-so-slightly, or perhaps that is the dim lighting of the room, casting dark, creeping shadows across the floor. While there has never been a cordiality or warmth to your relationship, you recognise that you have been spared the worst of his barbed hostility.

Before now, that is; now, the distance between you is far too great. 

“Did you now?” He sneers.

In response, you draw up, mindful not to appear challenging as you tip your chin. 

“I’m here because I have a proposition for you,” you announce clearly. “I hoped you would be reasonable and hear me out.” 

Snape’s eyes narrow icily and suddenly you are in his Potions class again, overseen with strict authority. One wrong move, and the concoction will spoil and poison you. His black robes billow as he approaches, expanding like the hood of a cobra. 

“There is nothing you could possibly offer me,” he says, folding one shrouded arm over another. “And so there is nothing to discuss. Leave.” 

Your nerves are strung so tight, you can’t help but object: “The Carrows are far too cruel in their methods! Too brutal. The students-” 

“Are very fortunate to have been granted mercy by the Dark Lord,” Snape interrupts, and you swallow thickly. Of course, you could not have forgotten the festering dark mark that now itches underneath his robes, writhing and serpentine.

“But it isn’t enough,” you say, throat sandpaper dry. A rush of urgency floods your system. Now. It needs to be now, before you lose your courage. 

(A gash on the cheek, a row of dark-purplish bruises and welts, a swollen eye, whippings and burns, scars from chains, all so frightened, but brave still.)

“If you agree to grant my students your protection,” your voice falters. “I will give… Myself to you.”

The silence that follows is agonising. His expression is indecipherable; taut and stiff. You’re beginning to think that maybe you weren’t transparent enough. 

Your trembling hands drift towards your top buttons, and you start to undo them bit by bit. 

“Stop,” Snape orders. 

At this, you freeze. Your heart plummets starkly into your intestines. Oh. You hadn’t even considered that he would - or could - reject your offer. You fear you may have tipped the bubbling cauldron over and left it melting through the carpet. As you linger numbly, Snape’s tongue darts between his lips. Light flashes behind his stern black eyes. 

Perhaps he’s considering it, perhaps… 

“Come here,” he says sharply. You obey. 

Shuddering in the winter chill, you watch the slow bob of his Adam’s apple, the twitch of his lids as his gaze dips steadily downward… Snape’s forefinger comes to brush the fabric from your shoulder, his knuckle grazing your collarbone, and your pulse quickens anew. 

“I’ll do anything,” you plead. “Please, Severus.” 

“You will refer to me as ‘Headmaster,’” he corrects.

“Headmaster…” 

You suck in a shaky breath. Standing this close to him, you can make out the lilac rims of his sunken eyes and the worry lines on his forehead. 

He’s tired… The thought springs to mind, unbidden. 

The hand that tends to the rest of your buttons is not rough, but the coldness of his touch makes you flinch. Snape pulls down your outer robes in one swift motion, and you can’t help but gasp. Your nipples perk from the chill, skin prickled with goosebumps. Underwear was unnecessary, and though you knew that from the start, you are stripped so quickly it still leaves you cringing. He moves to fondle your breasts, and your breathing shallows. You stare desperately towards the floor, towards some old, faded tea stain.

“Fall on your knees, ___,” he tells you. 

You kneel quickly in front of him, and he moves to cup the nape of your neck. You don’t need to be instructed; you do your best to steady your hands and unfasten the button over his crotch. You nudge out his dick, and see that he’s already half-hard. 

Before he changes his mind, you spit into your palm and use it as lubricant as you get to work jerking him off. You can feel him watching you, silent and still. This situation is completely wrong, all wrong, but the awkwardness of it is almost juvenile. 

“___,” he calls above you. You stiffen. You know that cautionary tone. “If you have enough cheek to wag your tongue at me, you can also use it for this.” 

You nod faintly, licking your lips. Of course, you should have prepared for this, too, but you have barely even steeled your nerves. Hesitant, you lean forward and run your tongue along the shaft, tracing a vein. Your movements are practically mechanical; dispensing small, kitten licks over the tip, continuing to stroke him. This is now a kind of out-of-body experience for you, the sort of bizarre circumstance you can only encounter in a very strange dream. 

But then, Snape decides your next course of action for you, clutching your jaw and muffling your whimpers as he sinks into your mouth. 

A teardrop falls softly onto your chest, and it only occurs to you now that you’re crying. You gag out a sob as the tip of Snape’s cock hits the back of your throat, unable to prevent loose spit from dribbling down your chin. Above you, his breath hitches. 

“Open your eyes,” he demands. 

You didn’t know you had closed them; squeezed them tightly shut. You peek up at his pale face. 

His pupils are blown wide, almost entirely black. Snape forbids you to keep eye-contact with a firm grip over your head, and you gag again as he rocks his hips. You clutch his thighs for purchase while he fucks your face, tears streaming down your cheeks. For distraction, you try to focus on him, and his pleasure-stricken expression lulls you in like hypnosis; the tightness of his lips, his dark brows slightly furrowed, the minute twitches in his jaw. 

Snape’s thrusts begin to stutter, but he tightens his hold on you and forces you to take all of him. He drags in a sharp intake of breath, and warm, slightly bitter cum pools onto your tongue. 

“Swallow it. All of it.” 

You gasp for air, gulping it down hastily. 

“You'll be getting used to the taste of me. Stand.” 

Snape urges you up and steers you over to his table. Before you can blink, you’re whirled around and caged against his desk. The edge of it cuts harshly into your naked thighs, and you yelp. You can feel his long black hair sweep over your neck, a sensation that is almost ticklish. Snape yanks down your robes and they fall limply around your boots. Now, you are truly exposed, shivering and naked. The only source of warmth is his body heat pressed into your back, the starched, dark fabric of his clothing. 

His cool hand dips around and feels down your stomach, and your breath hitches as Snape unexpectedly plunges several fingers into your pussy. You shock yourself with how slick you are, mortified at the way he tsks behind you:

“Little slut. Is this what you’ve always wanted?” Snape hisses into your ear, spreading the pads of his fingertips over your labia, teasing your clit. 

“Yes!” You choke out. 

“Yes, Headmaster,” he pinches your clit warningly and it feels like an electric shock. 

“Yes, yes Headmast- ah…!” 

He starts to rub in rough, merciless circles, and you immediately try to stifle a cry against your wrist. Snape rips it impatiently from you. 

“Don’t even try to deny it. I can feel how wet you are.” 

It’s surely not the truth. Surely, you tell yourself... 

One long, deft forefinger slips into your slit and pumps steadily in and out. You let out a soft moan, unable to resist the quivering thrill that coils in your abdomen. You didn’t realise he would even try to prep you, and, against your will, you feel some of your fear dissipate. 

“You think I didn’t notice, did you?” He scoffs. “Always so desperate for my attention, always clamouring for a better grade.” 

Memories of your seventh year at Hogwarts resurface and spiral dizzily in your head. The newest, youngest professor, but strict and competent, and— 

Dark, sweeping cloak, black hair, black eyes… 

I even once wished I could brush away the strands…  

Then he retracts his fingers, slowly, torturously, You hate how you yearn for his touch in its absence, how you crave the buzz to smother your discomfort. 

Snape bends you cleanly over the polished table, your still damp breasts pressing into the hardwood. He traces a long, thin finger down your back, tracing languidly across your spine; you could almost believe his touch is tender. Almost. Instinctively, you try to turn your head to face him, but he denies you with a firm hand gripping the base of your neck. You whimper as he lathers cold precum on your thighs, positioning his straining dick over your entrance:

“…Or was it praise you were hoping for?” His voice is low and subdued. Snape’s breath fans over you, and for a moment you falter.

No, of course you don’t expect— 

No, not from Professor Snape. Only your best was acceptable. To elicit a nod of approval, or even a commending glance, you couldn’t possibly hope—

“Headmaster, I— I only ever wanted you to…” 

“Beg for it,” his tone sharpens again. 

Snape slips the tip of his cock inside your folds. But then, he stops, and does not move. You are trapped between his desk and him, left pitiful and squirming. 

“Headmaster,” you say weakly. “Please.” 

“Please what, ___?” 

You grit your teeth, still bristling at the indignity of it all. But you know that, whether he’s enjoying himself or not, Snape has the patience to wait this out. 

“Please, fuck me!” you plead.

You gasp as he grips your thighs and slides himself in further with a lewd, wet sound. Your walls stretch around him as you adjust to his length. He groans softly and rolls his hips, sinking deeper into your cunt, until you’re utterly full of him.

Despite it all, it feels sinfully good, but his movements are so sluggish that you can’t help but whine pathetically into the wooden table. 

“And what exactly is it that you’ve always wanted?” 

What I always wanted, when I was in Potions class… 

“For you to p-praise me, Headmaster.” 

In an instant, you realise this is true. Deep down, you have always hoped for his sole attention… And now he’s invading that dark, primordial world in between, spurring on those secret and forbidden desires you should never have conceived. 

Snape slowly pulls out, dragging every inch of his cock, and then snaps his hips back in, briefly hitting that sweet, sensitive spot that has you seeing stars. 

“Please!” You add, letting out a shrill moan. 

“And do you? Do you want this…?” 

He mutters so quietly, it almost sounds like he’s begging you. Snape’s pace is set now, rocking powerfully into you as you fill the air with loud, desperate whimpers. 

“I do!” You breathe, mind-numbingly uncertain. 

But it doesn’t matter anymore if you want it or not; the sensation is so overbearing and so ruthless, unforgiving and unfair, just like him. You’re barely cognizant of the arms that curl around your naked waist, almost embracing you, until they provide cushioning against the sharp desk. 

“You take me so well,” he murmurs, “So well.” 

Your head spins, threatening to give up on you completely. You could never have predicted such a drastic change in demeanour. The way he’s treating you now is so different from his earlier cruelty; his affectionate caresses might be almost loving. 

“So tight, so good for me…” He groans again, heavily, and the vibrations thrill up your spine as he spears you on his dick. “You’re doing perfectly.” 

He kneads the soft flesh of your thighs, sighing blissfully. You can feel the spiking thrum of Snape’s heartbeat, the soft touch of his lips on your neck, kissing reverently over your shoulder blade. You wish you could just see the expression on his face, if you could only see Severus for one moment…

“Headmaster,” you pant, craning your head. 

“Don’t,” he says hurriedly. “Don’t look at me.” 

Snape doesn’t relent, forcing you firmly in place with a hard squeeze on your shoulder. There’s something thick and vulnerable in his voice that you can’t place, but all you can respond with is a needy cry as he speeds up, angling his thrusts just right. You can feel the familiar shock of pleasure coiling up in your belly now, surging from how deep he reaches. 

“I’m the only one who can fuck you like this, aren’t I?” He snaps without warning, bursting with emotion again. You can only nod frantically in response.

“Yes, yes, Headmaster!” You sob, your eyes stinging with tears again.

Snape’s movements only grow stronger, his breathing heavier and huskier. His fingernails are digging small, half-moon indents into your skin. You don’t try to stifle the wanton moans that spill from your lips anymore, clawing for purchase at the wood. 

“___… When you cum, you cum for me.” 

Uncontrollably, you arch into the table. Your leg is cramping up from the exertion, muscles pulled taut, and you’re going to, you’re going to—

Your orgasm drowns the rest of your thoughts in static, white, hot bliss that smothers you. Snape shudders and moans as he buries himself to the hilt, pumping you full of his seed. His black cloak sweeps over you as he pulls out, far too soon, leaving you quivering and dripping with his cum.

The last, mangled strands of lucidity swim hazily in your mind. It takes a moment for you to remember why you were here at all.

After a few seconds, he releases you from the confines of his desk without a word. You bend down and hoist the ring of fabric up past your hips again, though your skin is sticky and damp. After a deep, shaky breath, you dare to glance at Snape. 

There’s a thin sheet of sweat beading his forehead. Snape helps you pull your robes over your shoulders. He silently fastens your buttons back up again for you, and his touch is surprisingly gentle. You don’t rebuff him. Your hands are trembling enough as it is. 

“Promise me that you’ll…” You halt.

Your vision is still blurry, but you could swear he looks like the old Severus. Not the figurehead or the professor, but the man. The Severus you once knew. 

There’s a strange look in his eyes that you don’t understand, and maybe you never will. 

You’re so dead tired you can barely drag your feet back to the staff’s living quarters. You wake Minerva— or, no, she is already occupied by her usual routine of restless pacing, tugging at her tartan dressing-gown. While she does interrogate you a bit crossly, you can tell she empathises with your ‘insomnia.’

After that you gulp down a contraceptive and stumble into bed, boneless and weary. You don’t cry at all, though you feel that you probably should.

In a way, you’re glad that Minerva doesn’t appear concerned or worried for you. That means she hasn’t found out. There was a persistent paranoia in the back of your mind that she had, that Minerva had seen or heard or sensed it somehow.

You wonder if she’d feel disgusted, or if she would simply pity you. Maybe that would be worse.

You flick your wand and flush out the light.

No. No one needs to know what you’ve done.

A month passes. The grip of winter releases its hold, and spring emerges in its wake, fresh and pure. It’s as if you can finally breathe again.

You hope that you do not imagine the way your student’s faces regain some semblance of warmth. You hope you do not imagine the unmarred bodies, mercifully free from wounds. You also hope that it is not their own schemes or plans that embolden them.

They should leave those matters to you.

Somehow, it feels like the nightmare is almost over. But not yet. Not yet. You still await your orders, and nurse lofty dreams of freedom in your heart.

When night falls, you strip off your underclothes and climb the spiral staircase once more. It is not excitement that tightens your chest, but it is also not dread. Perhaps something else you also do not understand, and cannot afford to think of now.

Headmaster Snape is standing by his desk. You realise he’s been waiting for you. He has that strange, mystifying look in his eyes again.

He offers you a hand.

“Come here,” he says.

[st4rr-girrl]

Video Games

M.R

Summary; The toxic relationship between Mattheo and (Y/n).

Warnings; unrequited love, asshole Mattheo, NSFW, slight smut, angst, swearing.

A/N; this was my first song fic— but I hope you like it! This took me like two hours to write and I’m not joking 😭😭

Based on the song — video games, by Lana Del Rey

Swinging in the backyard.

Pull up in your fast car.

Whistling my name.

“(Y/n!)” Mattheo called out, with a wide, slap-able grin on his face. He was seated in the front seat of his fast, expensive mustang— watching your figure as you swung on the swing located in front of your house. It was summer, which meant you didn’t have to be at Hogwarts.

You excitedly hopped off the swing, your hair flowing in the wind as you rushed up to his car with a smile. “Hi Mattheo.” You cooed to your boyfriend, opening the car door and getting seated in the passenger seat. He nodded in acknowledgment, his eyes scanning up and down your body— but never landing on your face.

Without another word, he drove you to his house.

Open up a beer,

And you say, "Get over here

And play a video game.”

“(Y/n)! Check out this new video game I just got!” Mattheo called out from his bedroom. Wearing a white tank top, and underwear— as you two had just had intercourse— you kicked the fridge shut gently, and brought the two beers in your hand to his bedroom. You smiled sadly, your gaze flickering to the TV— which had his newest video game displayed on it. He was seated on his bed, biting his lip in concentration as his hands guided their way over his controller. You sat down in his bed, opening the beer and taking a swig before tossing the other beer next to him.

I'm in his favourite sundress.

Watchin' me get undressed,

Take that body downtown.

You were getting ready for a date with Mattheo, smiling to yourself in the mirror as you applied your lipgloss. You were wearing Mattheo’s favorite sundress, along with his favorite perfume— in order to please him. You ruffled your hair up, to give it more volume, before standing up as you heard a honk outside your house. You happily strolled downstairs, a small pep in your step as you opened the front door. A wide grin melting into your delicate features as you walked to his car, opening it and taking a seat in the passenger side.

“Hi baby.” You smiled, kissing his cheek affectionately. His eyes scanned up and down your body, before he bit his lip and turned his gaze back to the road and started to drive.

“You look amazing.” He complimented, making your cheeks flush and your heart pound.

You offered a cheeky grin, staring at your lap and clasping your hands together. “Thank you.”

-

Mattheo sat on his bed, watching as you slowly took your sundress off. His gaze was filled with lust and hunger as he stared at your body, biting his lip subconsciously. You wanted nothing more than to please him, and do whatever he asked of you.

-

You were laying in bed with Mattheo on top you you. “Fuck, baby. Your body is so hot.” He spoke breathlessly, pulling himself out of you before grabbing the beer on his nightstand. He stood up, putting his boxers on before walking to his TV and turning it on, before sitting back in bed and opening up his video game.

I say “You the bestest.”

Lean in for a big kiss,

Put his favorite perfume on.

Go play your video game.

“You’re the best, Mattheo.” You whispered, leaning up and kissing him passionately. He kissed back, in a half-assed manner— his eyes still glued onto his video game. You pulled away, frowning slightly as he turned his full attention to the video game. Heaving a sigh, you stood up and walked to the bathroom. You wet a rag, cleaning up what Mattheo had left behind on your skin with a small, sad frown.

It’s you, it’s you, it’s all for you.

Everything I do.

I tell you all the time,

“Heaven is a place on earth with you.” You whispered, your hand running through his hair as he laid in your lap, playing his video game. He didn’t seem to be listening, however. “Tell me all the things you wanna do.” You cooed seductively, biting your lip as he raised a brow, redirecting his attention to you with a lustful smile. If intercourse is what you had to do to get his attention, you’d do it. But instead he turned his attention back to his video game, with a shrug— insinuating he only wanted to play his video game without you getting involved.

I heard you like the bad girls, honey.

Is that true?

“What’s your type?” Theo asked Mattheo with a small smirk, assuming he’d describe you. Neither of them seemed to notice your presence lingering behind the corner of the hallway— peeking into the living-room where the two boys were smoking and drinking.

“I like bad girls.” Mattheo replied with a smirk of his own, raising a brow. Theo looked slightly surprised, and raised a brow aswell. You weren’t a bad girl. You were a good girl, who got good grades and stayed out of trouble. You frowned, backing up and walking down the hallway.

-

After summer, you returned to Hogwarts.

“Take it back, bitch!!” You shouted, kicking and punching the air as a Professor dragged you off of a girl. The girl had a fat lip, and forming bruises as she was also being dragged away from you.

“Never, slut!” She screeched, trying to pull away from the Professor to attack you.

Before you met Mattheo, you would’ve never done something like this. You would’ve simply kept your head down and kept walking. But after the conversation you overheard, you tried your hardest to be the one he wanted.

Mattheo smirked as he saw this, his amusement arising as he stared at you. He was turned on, but felt no sort of affection towards you. He was apathetic.

-

You and Mattheo were sitting in his bed in his dorm room, and per usual, he was invested in his video game. You grabbed a cigarette, lighting it and numbly staring at the screen as you took a drag. Mattheo smirked with a raised brow, turning his head towards you. “Since when do you smoke?” He snickered cruelly.

“Since now.”

It’s better than I ever even knew.

They say the world was built for two.

Only worth living is somebody is loving you.

And baby, now you do.

With your newfound personality change for Mattheo, his interest in you rose— only noticeably to you. You soaked up the attention, getting into fights, smoking, drinking, getting piercings, anything to get his attention. It was working.

Swingin’ in the old bars,

Swingin’ with the old stars,

Livin’ for the fame.

You felt famous. Not only were you collecting the sliver of attention from Mattheo, but the people at school seemed to notice the behavior from you. Mattheo found it amusing, others found it disturbing and dramatic, but teachers found it disappointing and heartbreaking.

Kissin’ in the blue dark,

Playin’ pool and wild darts,

Video games.

You were at a party, sitting down on the couch and chugging the alcohol from your bottle. You were already drunk, and on the verge of blacking out. The music was muffled, and your eyes were red and half lidded. Mattheo was speaking with his friends, before noticing you. He strolled over to you, and took a seat next to you.

He holds me in his big arms,

Drunk and I am seeing stars,

This is all I think of.

You started making out with Mattheo in the corner passionately. A red solo cup half empty with alcohol, and a burning cigarette in your opposite hand. You were drunk, and the world was spinning— but you felt safe in Mattheo’s arms.

Watchin’ all our friends fall,

In and out of old Paul’s.

This is my idea of fun.

Video games.

Your friends got drunk every other night, stealing the alcohol from the Old Paul’s bar, with fake IDS. You joined them, stumbling in and out of the bar feeling giddy and giggly from the alcohol in your veins.

It’s you, it’s you, it’s all for you.

Everything I do.

I tell you all the time,

“Heaven is a place on earth with you.” You reminded him, as he played his video games— even though you knew he wouldn’t be listening to you. “Tell me all the things you wanna do.” You tried speaking, but he was completely and utterly enamored in the video game he was playing. With a defeated sigh, you laid down and smoked a cigarette, staring at the ceiling.

I heard you like all the bad girls, honey.

Is that true?

Even as you continued being a bad influence, he slowly got used to it— which meant less attention. You felt defeated. You stayed up, wondering how he could put you through so much and not even feel a single inch of love towards you. After the things you did for him. The effort you put into your relationship. You felt lost, and unloved.

It’s better than I ever even knew.

They say the world was built for two.

Only worth living if somebody is loving you.

And baby, now you do.

After a while, you gave up on trying to grab his attention by being a troublemaker. You felt so alone. You stopped trying so hard, and your relationship only surrounded sex. You started being less of a troublemaker, and focused more on school than anything else.

It’s you, it’s you, it’s all for you.

Everything I do.

I tell you all the time,

“Heaven is a place on earth with you.”

“Tell me all the things you want to do.”

I heard you like the bad girls, honey.

Is that true?

He started to miss your voice. He started to miss how you would constantly boost his ego, and support him with whatever he was doing. How you would do small things for him, and how much affection you showered him in. How much trouble you’d get into just to be considered ‘his type.’

It’s better than I ever even knew.

They say the world was built for two.

Only worth living if somebody is loving you.

And baby, now you do.

He loved you now. But it was too late. You had broken up with him, separated yourself from your friends and focused on your schoolwork. He stared at you in the halls, during class, during dinner, breakfast, and lunch. He looked at your face. Something he failed to do when you were together. Now he was the one who had to fight for your attention. And holy fuck, it hurt him so bad.

And now you do.

Now you do.

Now you do.

Now you do.

Now you do.

Baby, now you do.

(Requested by @priyanichhabra)

Master list located on my pinned post!

[mrsriddles-blog]

Iris | M.R

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle X Slytherin Fem Reader

WC: 3.2k+

Warnings/Notes: Mild language, angst, fluff, slow burn, crappy dad…

Summary: In which you are Mattheo’s safe haven, the Iris in his life… 🌙

And I'd give up forever to touch you

'Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't wanna go home right now

You sat in the Common Room, curled up in one of the oversized armchairs by the fireplace as you read. Mattheo sat on the sofa, trying to act as if he was working in his journal, but really he was focused on you.

He wasn't one to get shy or nervous, but around you he did. For the longest time, he was so careless and reckless, but then he happened to have noticed you. You were careful, and some would argue boring as you preferred playing it safe. It made some of your housemates question how your a Slytherin.

But, Mattheo noticed how you were caring and loving to those so important to you—and the first years. Typically, the first years are left to fend for themselves, but you always help them settle in and find theirselves a group of people.

You had easily fit into your guys' shared friend group, yet he found himself wanting more than a friendship with you. You were the light in his life, and for that he'd be forever thankful.

He was struggling before he had met you. He was getting angrier, getting into more fights, feeling more spiteful, drinking more and even smoking more. He was pushing all his friends away, until you. You brought him back. He found himself controlling his anger so he didn't scare you. He stopped fighting as much as he knew you hated it. He stopped drinking and smoking as much. He hadn't felt spiteful really since he met you. It was you had provided him with such tranquility—such heaven.

Yet, he couldn't ever admit his feelings to you. He was too scared to. He was scared he'd lose you and he didn't want that. He wanted you in his life someway, somehow. If that was by being friends, he was content with that.

You yawn and he knew you'd be going to bed soon which meant he too would go to bed soon. He was only up because he saw you were the only person in the Common Room. He originally felt bold and was going to express his feelings, but he found himself backing out and cursing himself for being a chickenshit.

And all I can taste is this moment

And all I can breathe is your life

When sooner or later it's over

I just don't wanna miss you tonight

Mattheo found himself awake from nightmares, so here he was sitting in the Common Room at two in the morning.  He hadn't had a nightmare in so long and it irked him so much that they had begun once more. He was so upset and he found himself crying, so he left so he wouldn't wake up his roommates.

He was sure they wouldn't care and that they'd be concerned, but he didn't want that. He was already embarrassed that he was having nightmares again. He felt like a little kid.

He tenses, hearing footsteps towards the Common Room and he glances over to see you stumble in. He was quick to look at the fireplace, wiping his face of any traces that he'd cried earlier.

"Matty? What are you doing up?" You mumble sleepily as you stumble towards the couch.

"Dunno'." He mumbles, internally cursing himself for pushing you away now.

"Are you okay?" You mumble.

"I just...want to be alone right now." He says, sighing after he realized how douchey that sounded.

You were more awake now, trying to get a grasp on this moment. Mattheo was hot and cold in moment. Typically hot with you, but right now he was being cold which was strange. You noticed he looked upset and you frowned. You move over to the couch he was sitting on. You place a hand on his arm and frown as he tenses.

"Oh Matty, you don't got to talk about it. I get it, but I can tell you most definitely don't want to be alone right now. You don't have to put that facade up for me. Here, lay down." You say, patting your lap.

He stared at you in bewilderment. How was it you weren't intimidated and scared when he got cold with people? You weren't even fazed aside from being more caring and concerned. But, you didn't pry. You simply wanted to provide comfort. You understood that he didn't want to bare his soul open to the world right now, you understood he felt misunderstood and broken. He moves, laying his head on your lap.

You toss a blanket over his lower half before you run your fingers through his hair. You hum softly, smiling as he relaxes and he soon was falling asleep. You followed not long after.

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

Mattheo knew he had been awkward with you in the morning upon waking up with his head on your lap, your fingers still in his hair. You didn't seemed bother, or if you were, you kept it hidden.

He was currently seeking you out during your guys' free period to apologize. He knew he was in a strange headspace last night and he felt as if he put a lot on you.

He found you sitting under the tree you all tended to occupy with your friends. Thankfully, your guys' friend group had some studying to do in the library. He sits next to you and you look up from your book before closing it as you smile at him.

"Hey, Matty." You say softly.

"Hey...I wanted to apologize for last night. I know I was a bit rude to you and I'm sorry. And I'm sorry if I put you in a weird position." He says.

"Matty, you don't need to apologize. It's okay! I don't know what's going on and you don't have to tell me. I just hope that whatever it is, it gets better. If you decide if you want to talk about it, I'm always here. There's no shame in talking about your feelings, Matty. I know you don't believe that, but it can be a good thing to talk time to time." You say, smiling encouragingly and softly.

"Can I tell you something?" He blurts.

"Anything." You murmur.

"I've had nightmares since I was a kid because my father. I haven't had them since second year until last night. So...I was upset and I was embarrassed. I'm sorry." He blurts, how cheeks flushing red in embarrassment and frustration.

"Matty, don't apologize. It's okay. I'm sorry you had a nightmare. It's nothing to be embarrassed about though. I have some too still...I've got a really crappy dad and use to...I'd have my mom to hum. Her humming always calmed me down and made me feel safe. But, she passed and then I was alone...it was just my dad and me." You say, smiling sadly at Mattheo who stared at you in surprise.

"I never knew that." He says.

"I don't talk about it a lot. I don't think I've told anyone that since transferring here believe it or not. I just...I don't know...I don't want to be pitied. I want to be seen for me, not that I have a crappy homelife." You explain. 

"All those fights I use to get into...it was to make me know that I was in fact alive. For such a long time, I just felt like my world was black and white. Fighting made me feel adrenaline and this rush and then my getting hurt...it all made me feel alive." He admits.

"Oh Matty, if you ever feel like that...like you need a moment to know you're alive, come to me. I'll show you." You murmur.

"I've been feeling that for awhile, Y/n/n. I don't think you can do anything." He says sadly, looking off into the distance.

You gently nudge him with your elbow and he looks at you. You bite your lip nervously before looking at his lips. You lean forward slowly, glancing up unsure only to see his eyes on your lips which encouraged you. You close your eyes, your lips moving softly against his.

And you were right.

His heart sped up, as a rush went through him. He kissed you back, his hands settling on your hips as he pulled you onto his lap. You pull away slowly, looking at his with a shy smile, flushed cheeks and blown pupils.

"Fuck me, I hate it when you're right." He says, chuckling as you laugh softly.

"In case that didn't tell you how I felt, I like you, Matty. A lot. I see you more than you know and I want to be able to love every piece of you. The good and the bad." You murmur.

He leans forward, kissing you again as he tried to express his own feelings. You smile into the kiss, understanding exactly what he was saying.

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming

Or the moment of truth in your lies

When everything feels like the movies

Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive

Word spread like a wildfire of Mattheo and your relationship and even three months later, it was still the big news.

Mattheo stood outside the Great Hall, nervously pacing with the big bouquet of purple flowers. There were a little this and that in there, but mostly irises. He learnt in Herbology that irises meant hope, faith, courage, and wisdom. Once the two of you began to officially date, he told you that you were his hope.

He walks in, seeing you dressed in a white sweater dress, laughing amongst your shared group of friends. Pansy sees Mattheo first and grins which catches the rest of the groups attention. You turn back just as he got about two or three steps from the table. Your jaw goes slack as your eyes water slightly.

"Happy three months, love." He says, nervously, handing you the bouquet.

"Thank you Matty, these are beautiful! Oh, look at these irises. They are so beautiful!" You say softly, looking at the different assortment.

He smiles, taking a seat next to you as he finds himself feeling much more relieved that you loved them. You lean over, kissing his cheek as you smile softly at him.

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

You were nervously playing with your hands, your father sat across from you in the limo he owned. You were going to the Christmas's Ball hosted by the Malfoy's, but you were going to be meeting your boyfriend's father for the first time. Which meant your own father was as well.

"Stop that." He snaps.

"H-Huh?" You mumble confused before facing a sharp smack.

You stare out the window for the rest of the ride with watery eyes. You were more than happy to get out of the limo, but you unfortunately had to walk in with your father.

"Don't you go straying off, we are meeting your boyfriend's father." He snaps, grabbing your upper arm in a tight grip.

Your friend group had turned when you had walked in due to Mattheo's surprised look. You were dressed in a gorgeous dark green gown the hugged your upper body and was flowy in the skirt. You hair was done perfectly along with your makeup.

But, they noticed about the same time as Mattheo was the big ugly bruise on your cheek and the way your father grabbed your arm.

"F-Father, d-do we even know where he's at?" You ask.

"Shut up, can't you ever just shut up?" He snaps harshly at you, walking down a corridor.

Mattheo was following which made your father turn as he heard footsteps.

"Excuse me sir, I can take you to my father. Hey love, you look beautiful." He says, trying to give you a small smile.

You could see he was furious and you shake your head sadly. Your father didn't loosen his grip on you, but he agreed to follow Mattheo who led you both up a flight of stairs.

You reach a sitting room and you see his father in an arm chair. You had heard rumors that he had a spell made to reverse the affects of the horcruxes, but you didn't believe it until now. The man looked to be in his early twenties, with sharp features, a lanky yet toned build, and cold eyes.

"Mr. Y/L/N, I presume." He says.

"Yes." He says curtly.

"I'm Voldemort. Pleased to meet you...and Y/n, I've heard so much about you." He says, smiling coldly at your father before smiling softly at you.

"It's nice to meet you, sir." You murmur, trying to keep your face at an angle without it being noticed so he didn't notice the bruise.

He holds his hand out and you didn't miss how his eyes lingered on your father's hold on your arm. You gently pulled at your arm which allowed it to be released as you took his hand. You were appalled when he kissed your hand, before he focused on the red angry mark on your arm that was starting to bruise.

He murmurs a spell and watches it heal before turning your face toward Mattheo and healing the bruise on your cheek. You look back at Voldemort.

"Thank you." You murmur.

"Of course. Go enjoy the party with Mattheo. Your father and I...we are going to chat for a while. Please do save me a dance." He says.

"Of course, sir. Thank you again." You murmur.

Mattheo holds his arm out to you and you smile softly at him as you link your arm with his. Unaware of his father's eyes watching you both as Mattheo opens the door letting you walk through first with him following close behind. He smiles slightly, admiring how far his son had grown.

"Are you okay?" Mattheo murmurs.

"I'm fine. He was actually in a much better mood than I expected." You admit as you walk down the stairs with Mattheo.

"That's him in a better mood?" Mattheo asks, his own anxiety spiking as he fears what a bad mood is like with you near him.

"Yeah, probably one of the best I've ever seen him in, oddly enough. Your father was...nice. I was expecting him to hate me, respectfully." You say.

"He's been different since the spell reversed his looks and negative affects he faced. He's even been a better father dare I say. It's been...strange. He did seem to really like you. I just...I worry about your father." He admits.

Your eyes widen as you look at him.

"I don't think he'll kill him. Worst is that he’ll hex him and maybe threaten him about hurting you. That really set him off. He genuinely was excited to meet your father, but his mood shifted when he saw how your father was treating you." He explains.

"I just want to enjoy the night with you, Matty." You whisper.

"Would you do me the honor and dancing with me, love?" He asks.

"Of course." You say, smiling widely at him.

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

You knew Mattheo was having a rough day. It was the anniversary of his mother's death and he was having a hard day coping.

Oddly enough, his father owled you and told you some things about Mattheo's mother and some things that may cheer him up. You owled him a letter back in thanks and wished him well.

You roped Theodore and Enzo in with helping set a few things up. You walked to the boys' dorm to see that they must've all left Mattheo to be alone. He was staring up at the ceiling.

"Love, I think I want to be alone." He mumbles.

"I love you and respect you, but let me be here, okay?" You murmur, climbing onto his bed.

He genuinely felt better as you wrapped your arms around him, allowing him to shift to be the little spoon as you managed to be the big spoon. You rest your chin on his shoulder as you squeeze him tightly.

"You're gonna kill me, love." He mumbles, managing a small smile.

"I just love you so much. I'm sorry." You whisper, kissing his cheek.

He hums, pushing himself back further into your embrace. You held him until he was ready to go to breakfast where he didn't necessarily want to talk or eat, just a change of scenery. You managed to get him to eat some food and drink his juice—-and even a few smiles out of him.

You took him to the courtyard, reading his favorite book to him while playing with his hair. His eyes were closed as he half-listened to you and half-thought of how grateful he was for you.

Around dinner time, he followed you with confusion to the Astronomy Tower. You had set up dinner here and planned to watch the starts with him as he and his mother use to when he was a child. You made sure to get his favorite snacks and even a few of his mothers.

"Love...what is all this." He whispers.

"Your father owled me and told me today is always a particularly rough day for you. I had already planned on spending the day with you, reading and cuddling...but he gave me a few other ideas. He told me your mom and you would watch the stars so I thought if you were up to it that we could watch them together. And he told me some other favorite foods and snacks of yours...along with a few of your mothers. I understand if this is a lot. We can go to dinner and I bet Teddy and Enzo wouldn't mind cleaning this up." You ramble, suddenly doubting yourself as you looked anywhere, but him.

"Love...thank you." He admits, his voice cracking as he pulls you into a soft kiss.

Your heart broke for the boy you loved so dearly. He was so heartbroken of the loss of his mother. He didn't deserve this.

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

"You father seriously doesn't mind me spending the summer with you guys?" You ask for what felt like the hundredth time to Mattheo.

"He's ecstatic to have you over, love. He's got the whole summer planned with fun activities." He sighs, giving you a pointed look.

"I'm sorry! I'm just nervous! Gosh." You pout.

"I love you." He murmurs, giving your lips a pec.

"Hey, not long enough mister." You pout.

He grins before leaning back in to kiss you softly in which you reciprocated as you couldn't help, but smiling into the kiss.

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

[plathfiles]

𝐀𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚 | 𝐑.𝐋

summary : Remus writes a song about you. Based off of Arabella by The Arctic Monkeys. You and him are just sitting in his bedroom one night and he has his guitar and note book out. You just blissfully admire his genius.

warnings : tooth rotting fluff :) arabella acoustic??

pairing : leadsinger! Remus Lupin x fem! reader

a/n ： lead singer! Remus is my new obsession and won’t shut up about it. Please send requests <3

The night air was blowing softly through the window, as the only light in the room was a lamp on Remus’ bedside table. You were sitting at the edge of the bed, admiring the way he practiced at his guitar. He was mainly just playing around with cords, focused on creating something. He had this one melody stuck in his head and he needed to practice it.

Remus’ brows furrowed trying to articulate the sound in his head on to paper, but most importantly into the instrument in his hands.

“Whatcha working on?” You asked curiously. Your pink baby doll night gown brushing against the soft sheets as you moved next to you boyfriend.

“A song,” he said simply, then adding. “About you,” he smiled softly, a smirk playing on his lips.

You’re breath hitched, “you’re writing something about me?” You asked, like that was somehow unbelievable.

But Remus was head over heels for you. He felt like he needed you around all the time. You needed him too.

“Yeah, it’s rough but I have some lyrics written down.” He said, showing you the notebook. The pages were crinkled and there was no lack of coffee staines.

“She’s got a seventies head, but she’s a modern lover,” you read from the notebook. You blushed, liking the way Remus though about you.

You kept reading, “And her lips are like the galaxies edge.” You passed the notebook back and smiled.

“This is about me?” You asked, surprised. You couldn’t believe it. Remus smiled and nodded, leaning into you.

“Yes it’s about you. It’s all true too,” he said, looking at your eyes and then at your lips. You blushed, his scent of chocolate and cigarettes becoming intoxicating. “It’s about when we first met,” Remus further explained. “You we’re so enchanting I knew I just had to know who you were.”

You and Remus had met at a party his hand was throwing after a concert. Your friends had dragged you along, because they were obsessed with the new rock band in the area.

Listening to their music, you became a fan of there’s. Now you were dating their guitarist and lead singer.

A memory of you and him kissing in a closet at the party made you blush. Originally, the two of you just wanted to get away from the large crowd of people.

“I love it so far. Does it have a name?” You asked, leaning in close to him with a soft smirk.

“The song will be named after you my love,” he said matter of factly. Then he pulled you into a kiss, it was both equal parts soft and passionate. Your lips captures in his perfectly.

“I really was enchanted to meet you,” he said, pulling away and brushing hair away from your face.

You couldn’t get the smile out of your mouth. “You’re too good for me Remus. I don’t deserve you,” you leaned into his touch.

“You deserve the world. You deserve a song,” Remus said, leaning in to kiss you again. You kissed back, pulling him close to you.

You couldn’t wait until the song was finished and to hear it played at one of the Marauders concerts.

a/n: I had a blast writing this!! sorry if it’s short tho. thank you for all the support in recent days love ya <3

[luizd3ad]

She's My Religion | Lily Evans x Fem!Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Lily Evans x Reader WC:8,636 CW: mentions of abuse, self-doubt, cursing, little bit of homophobia and use of homophobic slur, use of the word Mud-Blood (not used by reader), use of Y/N, Reader is implied to be a Slytherin but not directly specified, mentions of violence, death threats, It’s kinda angsty, but cute at the end. Author's Note: I’ve never wrote for Lily so I’m sorry if this is out of character or something idk I tried this is also the longest fic I’ve written I didn’t mean for it to be this long😅. Summary: What happens when Sirius Blacks little sister and Regulus Blacks twin sister starts to fall for the intelligent and beautiful Lily Evans?

I made this cute little mood board idk I just love this tbh

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳

Y/N Black had always been seen as the colder Black out of her and her two brothers and that was saying something especially considering her twin, Regulus. 

Regulus and her had been close their whole lifes. Their eldest cousin Andromeda would say they were thick as thieves. Always doing everything together refusing to go or do anything without the other. 

But after years of abuse from their partners and then it only getting worse when their older brother Sirius left she closed up, to the point of even icing Regulus out to an extent.

When Regulus made the choice to mend the bond between him and Sirius, Y/N made it clear that she wanted no part in it. 

In Y/N’s eyes Sirius didn't care, he didn't love her. She knew he didn't. If he did, why would he leave them? Why would he leave her? Especially with those people.

Sirius had always protected Regulus and Y/N as much as he could. He would take punishment, sneak them food if they were forced to go without. 

Eventually protecting them ment having Regulus go to The Potters with him when there was talk of an arranged marriage for Regulus.

Regulus left 12 Grimmauld Place during winter break in their 5th year, Y/N being left once again.  

At that point she'd separated herself from everyone who'd cared for her, admittedly it was mostly her brothers but also the few friends she and Regulus shared.

Sirius had tried many times to talk to Y/N but she never budged, she'd rarely spare him a glance. He was shattered, Sirius felt as if he'd lost his baby sister. 

Regulus took it worse not that he'd admit that to anyone who wasn't Sirius. He had hoped that she'd forgive them at some point and that she'd join them or at the very least understand why they left but she didn't. 

Y/N wouldn't speak, look, or even be in the same room as Regulus if she could help it. 

Regulus lost his twin, his other half, his life line and she didn't even seem to care. 

But she did care she cared so fucking much. 

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

Despite Y/N being cold and dark to those around her, she was smart.

Some would say smarter than Regulus, definitely smarter than Sirius. 

So it came as no surprise to her when the summer between her 5th and 6th year Y/N got word that she was to join the 7th year potions class.

Honestly she didn't care, Walburga was as pleased as she could be and Orion unsurprisingly couldn't care less.

But that's how she found herself being in the potion class the year above and being assigned partners with her. 

Lily Evans. 

Y/N didn't know much about Lily other than she was friends with her brother and his friends, she was smart, a Gryffindor and muggle-born.

Now Y/N didn't care for blood statues. It never made sense to her, the hatred that so many purebloods held for half-bloods or muggle-borns.

It all seemed barbaric and honestly a waste of time.

So, no Y/N didn't care that she was partnered with someone who was a muggle-born. 

She did care however that she was partnered with a friend of Sirius's. And it wasn't just a friend that he would see around and chat up with sometimes no, they were close friends.

This was going to be a problem.

“Hi, I’m Lily! Your Siris’ and Regs’ little sister right?”

Lily stuck out her hand for you to shake with one of the brightest smiles you think you've ever seen. 

You simply roll your eyes and dismiss her hand shake. 

“I prefer to be called by my name, Y/N, rather than being referred to as Sirius and Regulus' sister.”

Lily drops her hand and her smile falls just a tad, not enough for most people to notice, but you did. 

“Of course. I'm sorry, truly.”

“It's fine Evans.”

You say coldly, giving your undivided attention to Slughorn.

The rest of class was spent taking notes mostly with Lily attempting to make small talk every so often. You ignored her for the rest of the class.

You knew Lily was only trying to be nice but you also knew she was only trying to be nice so she could bring up your brothers.  

And talking about them was one of the last things you wanted to do.

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

Days started to pass turning into weeks, weeks turning into months.

You and Lily had been cordial.

You tried your best not to be completely rude to her since she always tried to make small talk and she was kind to you.

You actually grew quite fond of her over time but you didn't think that the two of you were friends by any means.

But you were acquaintances.

And you did like being in her presents.

It had been three months since school had started and Slughorn had announced that there was a project that was due in 2 weeks, right before christmas break would start and you were to work on it with your partner.

You sighed and looked to the side to see a smiling Lily. 

You weren’t upset that you had to do a project with Lily considering she was very smart and you liked being around her, but you were upset knowing that you'd have to spend time with her after class and knowing that where she goes her friends were not far most of the time.

Which meant there was a possibility of seeing her friends, which meant a possibility of seeing Sirius and or Regulus more than you'd like.

“Okay Evans we’ll meet at the library after classes are done so we can just get this done. Please refrain from bringing your friends.”

Lily knew what you meant by that, you were asking her to keep Sirius and Regulus away from you.

Lily chuckled and shook her head.

“They go where they please.”

Translation. She couldn't stop either of them, more specifically Sirius, even if she wanted to. 

“I see. I'll see you later Evans.”

You sigh once more gathering your things to walk away. 

“Bye Y/N.”

It always caught you off guard when she would call you by your first name instead of your surname. 

First names were meant for friends, yet she never called you Black. 

She only ever called you Y/N, as if you were good friends. 

You supposed that was just the type of person Lily was. She was nice to everyone unless they gave her a reason not to be. 

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

After classes you find yourself entering the library. You were expecting to have to wait for Lily but to your surprise she beat you there.

You walk to the table she was occupying, setting your things down.

Once she notices you she looks up from her seat smiling at you.

She had a very beautiful smile, one that made you feel your heart skip a beat for a moment. But you chose to ignore the feeling, deciding, hoping, it meant nothing. 

“How were your classes Y/N?”

Lily asked with genuine curiosity in her eyes. 

Did she actually care? She couldn't possibly care about my day. No, she didn't care, she was just asking to be polite. That was all. You tried to convince yourself.

“It was fine… How about you?”

Lily then went on about her day. She told you her favorite thing she learned that day, a joke her friend Mary told her that made you actually crack a small smile. 

You couldn't help but hold on to every word that came out of her mouth. 

Without you even realizing it Lily talking was easily becoming your favorite part of the days that followed.

You spent every day that week meeting with Lily at the library and you realized you actually really liked spending time with her. She had managed to make you smile a few times which was a rare sight.

Lily had this light to her that you couldn't describe. She was just everything good in the world. 

She was funny, smart, sweet, kind, beautiful and you wanted to spend every moment you could with her. 

You realized as the weekend grew closer you wouldn't have a reason to see her for two days. That bothered you and you couldn't figure out why. 

The two of you were working late in the back of the library. The library was practically empty.

“There's a Hufflepuff party tomorrow night. Are you going?”

“No. Parties aren't really something I enjoy. I’m assuming it’s safe to assume you're going?”

You say giving Lily a small smile.

“Yeah. We're all going… you should come.”

You knew what she meant. Sirius and most likely Regulus were going to be there.

Over the week of working with her she would make little suggestions now and then about seeing or talking to your brothers without blatantly saying so.

You just shook your head looking down at the table.

“I'm okay, thank you for the invitation.”

“Okay well, I'm going to Hogsmeade on sunday. Usually no one comes with me since they're all hungover. Would you like to join me?”

You felt yourself stop breathing. You didn't know why you felt this way. 

It was just Lily, but you've never spent time with Lily outside of an academic setting. 

Was this for the project? Or were you supposed to hang out as friends? Or was it.. More?

Did you want it to be more?

Before you have the chance to answer or contemplate further, your conversation was interrupted.  

“Oi, Black! Three blood traitors wasn’t enough for your line? You decided to become one yourself?”

Avery said, making Mulciber laugh. 

You look up at them about to get up but Lily grabs and squeezes your hand telling you to let it go. 

So you did.

“Aww isn't that cute? You’re shagging the Mud-blood now? Merlin your whole family is full of a bunch of fuckin’ poof-”

Before he can finish his sentence you have him on the ground holding his nose. You felt what some people would refer to as ‘The Black Family Madness’ cloud your mind. 

You thought it was just pure fucking anger, but what did you know?

You look down at Avery while having your wand pointing at Mulciber to keep him where he is, not showing any emotion on your face.

“I could kill you, you know? I could kill both of you. Make it look like self defense. ‘Oh i was so scared they cornered me and I- I didn't know what to do. I was scared for my life'.”

You say the last part in a mocking tone you then crouch in front of Avery looking him dead in the eyes.

“No one would even blink if you two died. Did you know that? I won't do it though because I refuse to risk myself being thrown in Azkaban. Especially for the likes of you, do you know why? It’s simple really, both of your lives put together don't even measure up to mine alone in terms of importance.”

You stand up straight looking at both of them.

“Now you're going to apologize to Evans for caller her such a vile and disgusting name, and if you don’t I will have a letter send to my mother by the end of the night about how I walked in on you two shoving your tongues down each other's throats and how I ‘just don't know what to do!’ and then we can see how your fathers react to just the idea of having ‘poofs’ inside they're line.”

You give them a small smirk while Avery and Mulciber look at each other debating if they're willing to have a rumor like that go around especially since it was a lie.

“And if you think my mother won't believe me. I reassure you, she will. Why would I lie? It wouldn’t benefit me as far as she's concerned and I am as close to a ‘perfect’ child as she'll ever get and if it comes out that the two of you might be shagging then the dirty looks get taken off The Black Family’ and move to The Mulcibers’ and The Averys’. So let's play this one smart boys.”

That seemed to convince Avery enough that he stands up and looks at Lily and forces out an ‘I’m sorry.’ 

Mulciber is a little more hesitant. You send a Stinging Jinx Mulcibers way, he falls to his knees with a small hiss and looks at Lily.

“I'm sorry Evans, really really sorry.”

Mulcibers cried out

“Now. You're both going to leave Evans alone. You are going to keep her name and both of my brothers' names out of your mouths. Am I understood?”

You say with no emotion on your face once again. 

They both let out quiet ‘yes’s’ while scrambling to leave.

After the ‘Madness’ had cleared from your mind it hit you what you did. You didn't feel bad about what you did but you realize you did it all in front of Lily. 

You don't even look at her as you start to gather your things.

“I’m sorry Evans, really. I-I should go.”

You ramble out while trying to walk away. Lily grabs your arm stopping you in your tracks.

“I won't lie and say I agree with what you did, but I don't blame you. I also appreciate you standing up for me. I'm not mad or scared of you Y/N.”

“I should have never done that in front of you. I'm sorry, really.”

“It's okay. I promise. Lets stop working tonight, yeah?”

You nod at Lily.

“Yeah. Okay” 

“So about Hogsmeade?”

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

You were sitting by the entrance of Hogwarts looking down playing with the matching serpent ring that Regulus had got for you and him a few birthdays ago. 

You've never taken it off.

You were just wearing some plain jeans and a jumper you had stolen from Sirius years ago. You find yourself wearing it when you think you might need moral support and you didn't know why but you felt a need to wear it today.

No matter how hurt you might be from your brothers leaving, you still loved them so much. You didn't necessarily blame them for leaving the house or the family, you just wish they were still with you.

You’re taken out of your thoughts when you hear footsteps coming your way. 

You look up and forget how to breathe for a moment. 

There she was. Lily fucking Evans walking towards you she was wearing a white long sleeve shirt and a plaid skirt it was so simple but she looked amazing.

Why are you feeling like this? Why does it feel like every time you're in her presents you feel like you can't breathe?

You've never felt this way before.

“Hey Y/N ready to go?”

“Yes.”

You felt like your words were stuck in your throat. 

She was just so fucking beautiful. 

You didn't talk much on your walk to Hogsmeade. You were too caught up in your head and Lily had noticed that.

“Are you okay Y/N?”

“Yes, I'm fine. How was your party last night?”

You asked, trying to change the subject. LIly knew what you were doing and she let you get away with it.

“It was actually a lot of fun. It would have been a lot more fun if you were there.”

Lily said, sending you a smile. 

You just rolled your eyes playfully with a small smile of your own, letting Lily go on about the things that happened. She told you everything that had happened as if she didn't want you to feel left out. You didn't realize how much a little act like that could make your heart speed up a bit.

By the time you had gotten to Hogmaede Lily was laughing at a story about something her friend Marlenne had done, you were just smiling. Whether you were smiling at the story or at her laugh you didn't know and you didn't want to think about it. You just wanted to enjoy the time with her.

At some point Lily grabbed your hand holding it as you went through multiple shops, you tried not to pay too much attention to how her hand felt in yours. There were a few disagreements here and there when you insisted on paying for the things she wanted.

She in her words 'didn't want you to waste your money’ and you just responded with ‘it's not a waste if it's you.’

She finally stopped fighting you after you told her that you loved spending money on things you knew your mother and father wouldn't agree with. It was one of your little acts of rebellion. Which was true but a part of you also just wanted to spoil her.. But she didn't have to know that.

By the time you two had gotten back to the castle it was almost dark. You walked Lily to the Gryffindor tower still holding her hand.

“You know you could come in right? They want to see you.”

Lily said, squeezing your hand gently to reassure you.

Since the school year started and you wouldn't talk to Regulus he stopped coming down to the dungeons if he could help it, he started to stay in the Gryffindor tower. So other than the few classes you shared and the occasional glances across the great hall you haven't seen your twin in months.

It killed a part of you but you were still so angry and hurt.

“Me and you both know that's not a good idea.”

You said looking down. Lily was about to disagree when the portrait opened out walking James Potter, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and last but not least both of your brothers. 

You could hear a pin drop in the corridor outside of the Gryffindor common room.

Sirius and Regulus stare at you without saying a word. No one moves, no one says anything.

You look back at Lily with your jaw clenched and drop her hand, putting your hands in your pockets. You didn't miss the hurt that flashes through her eyes but you didn't focus on it. You just had to get out of there.

“I'll see you later Evans, Yeah?”

You say to Lily mustering up a very small smile at her so she knew you were not upset with her. 

You started to walk away not even acknowledging the presents of anyone else. You do your best to keep walking away ignore the sound of talking down the hall, trying your best to not spare your brothers another glance

You just weren't ready to talk to them and you didn't even know if they actually wanted to talk to you.

So you just continue walking to the dungeons 

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

The next day Lily rushed into potions class, saying how sorry she was and explaining that she didn't know that was going to happen. It was all just poor timing.

All you could do was smile at her and reassure her that you didn't blame her.

You knew she wouldn't do something like that to you,

As the days passed by getting closer to the middle of the week you and Lily continued to get closer. You both would still meet up after classes in the library to finish up your project, the project that you both knew you could have finished, days ago.

You were coming to expect that you possibly had feelings for the girl but you knew she most likely just saw you as a friend.

You both were packing up for the night, you had finally finished with your project with two days to spare. It was a bittersweet moment.

“Y/N, what are you doing tonight?”

You looked up confused but you had a spark of hope in your chest.

“Nothing, probably go to my dorm, read, sleep… Why?”

“I have rounds tonight till 8:30. Do you want to meet after?”

“Um.. Okay? Yes, I'd like that. Um where should we meet?”

Lily then gave you one of her breath taking smiles obviously excited that you agreed.

“I'll come get you after I'm down, just meet me in front of the dungeons around 9?”

“Okay, Yeah.”

You were caught off guard when Lily walked over to you and hugged you.

The only people to have hugged you were your brothers and even then it had been years. You didn't know what to do for a moment so after some hesitation you hugged her back.

You felt her relax into you for a moment. You could smell her perfume, Strawberries and vanilla.

You reluctantly pulled away after a moment. You could see a light blush on her face and you couldn't imagine that you were any better.

“I'll see you later Evans.”

You say giving Lily a small smile and walking away with your things in hand.

Once you left the library you all but ran to your dorm. Your thoughts consume you.

That was a friend hug right? It had to be. Lily was just nice like that. Are friend hugs supposed to last that long though? You wouldn't know you wouldn't ever let anyone you were friends with hug you.

So then why did you let Lily hug you?

Why did you want to do it again?

Before you knew it it was 8:55 and you were waiting in front of the dungouse. You were still over thinking the hug.

Why was something so simple as a hug throwing you off? It didn't make sense.

You continued to think while absentmindedly playing with your ring. You were so lost in thought that you didn't even notice Lily till she put her hand on yours, stopping you from fidgeting.

You look at her and smile slightly.

“Where exactly are we going Evans?”

You ask, raising an eyebrow.

“Now why would I tell you that? Come on.”

Lily gave you a smirk and grabbed you hand leading you to wherever she was taking you. You couldn't help but blush at her holding your hand but you didn't pull away or protest it.

You let out a little chuckle when you finally realized where Lily was leading you.

“Really Evans? The astronomy tower? Seems a little cliché doesn’t it?”

You say with a teasing voice all Lily does is roll her eyes at you as you make it to the top of the tower.

When you get there you see that a few blankets and pillows are lying out.

You just blush again and Lily drags you over and has you sit with her in the pile of blankets and pillows.

“So why here?”

You ask leaning back on your hands.

“It’s just one of my favorite places. I like the stars.”

She says with a little shrug.

“Do you know about Cassiopeia?”

You ask, looking at her as she looks into the sky. Lily just shrugs and looks at you.

“Admittedly I’m not very good at astronomy. I would usually have… um Sirius do my work.”

Lily says looking scared that just mentioning your brother will have you running for the hills.

“Cassiopeia was the queen of Ethiopia; she was married to King Cepheus. One day she had angered Poseidon, she claimed that her and her daughter, Andromeda were more beautiful than the daughters of Nereus. So the sea nymphs, Nereids, asked Poseidon to send a monster to destroy King Cepheus's coast. To appease the monster, Cassiopeia and Cepheus chained Andromeda to a rock as a sacrifice, Perseus rescued Andromeda, but Poseidon still punished Cassiopeia, he took her and hung her in the heavens. Cassiopeia sits on her throne, but during part of the year, she appears upside down in the sky.”

Lily looks at you slightly shocked.

“How do you just know that?”

You chuckle and shake your head lightly.

“Evans, I’m a Black. It’s basically a requirement to know about the stars.”

“Okay fine, tell me about that one.”

She says point at a random constellation.

You tell her about every constellation or star she points at for a while, not noticing that the two of you have subconsciously been moving closer and closer. Eventually your shoulders are touching hands brushing against each other every so often. 

“Okay how about that one?”

She pointed at one of the clusters of stars you hoped she wouldn’t have pointed out.

Then again it was bound to happen.

“Canis Major the ‘great dog’ it’s built around Sirius, the Dog Star, the brightest star in the sky.”

You say looking down, playing with the ring on your finger.

There’s a silence for a moment, it’s not awkward but not necessarily comfortable either.

“They miss you, you know?”

Lily says, looking at you.

“I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

You say not looking at her at all.

A part of you knew you couldn’t look at her because if you did you’d tell her anything she wanted to know.

“They really do. Sirius and Regulus ask me how you're doing all the time Y/N.”

Lily says grabbing your hand to stop you from playing with your ring once again.

“Lily please.”

You say looking up at her. 

Your breath gets stuck in your throat for a moment once you realize how close the two of you are.

You're so caught up in the moment, so captivated by the most beautiful pair of green eyes you've ever seen that you didn't even notice.

You didn't even notice that you called her Lily. Not Evans. 

Just Lily.

“You know you have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen?”

Lily says, staring at your eyes.

“Funny. I was thinking the same thing.”

You said with a new found confidence. Lily looks down at your lips for a moment and then you both start to lean in slowly.

“Ooooo naughty naughty.”

You both jump at the sound of the most annoying Poltergeist known to man.

After a few minutes of Lily somehow convincing Peeves to not tell on us for being there. You found yourself walking Lily to the Gryffindor common room hand in hand for the second time in a week.

“I hope you had fun tonight, I’m sorry Peeves kinda ruined the night.”

Lily said, stopping in front of the entrance to her common room.

“It's not your fault. You didn't know he would be there. I still had a good time.”

She just smiled at you, not letting go of your hand. 

“I had a lot of fun too.”

You desperately didn't want the night to end but you didn't know how to express that. You weren't blind you could tell Lily most likely had some kind of feelings for you. There was just a part of you that was still so scared of being rejected or left.

“It's getting late so we should go to bed.”

You say ruining your thumb over her knuckles.

“What if I said I didn't want to go to bed yet?”

Lily said, stepping closer to you. 

You just smile and let out a little sigh looking her in the eyes.

“I would then say that as much as I don't want this night to end, we've already been caught once and it's late, we have class tomorrow and I wouldn't want to see you tired… though under different circumstances I would love to see you tired.”

You say to her while smirking at her with confidence that you didn't know you had.

Lily just looks at you speechless blushing more than you think you've ever seen her before. You then dare to kiss her cheek softly.

“Goodnight, Lily.”

You whisper while sending a small smile towards her, not waiting for a response you start to walk away.

This had been one of the best nights of your life.

 · · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

Even though you had finished your projects you and Lily found yourselves still meeting in the library after classes leading up to break.

You both had been more affectionate in your own ways, Lily had started bringing you little snacks and water because she thought you didn't eat enough or drink enough water.

You were just constantly holding her hand or hugging her when you got the chance. It didn't go farther than that physically but you two started shamelessly flirting more often.

Finally it was the day before everyone would leave for christmas break you had just turned in your project to Slughorn.

You were gathering your things to leave for the next class when you were hit with an idea.

“Lily, do you want to.. Maybe hang out tonight?”

You asked nervously while a faint blush took over your face. You don't know why you're so nervous. You had hung out with Lily so many times at this point, it should feel normal.

She smiled at you and nodded.

“Yeah. I'd like that.”

“Okay. meet me at the astronomy tower. Around 8?”

“Really Y/N the astronomy tower? How cliché.”

Lily says in a teasing tone.

“Hahaha, just meet me there okay?”

You gave Lily’s hand a little squeeze, sending her a smile.

After classes that day you got together a little picnic basket of all the candies and food that Lily had told you she liked at one point or another. 

You had gone and set everything up so you went back to your dorm to change into your favorite outfit. Finally it was time to meet Lily you found her eventually and smiled at how beautiful she looked.

“So where are we going?”

Lily asked as you walked up to her.

“Wouldn't you like to know?”

You say sending her a small smirk as she rolled her eyes.

“Yes I actually would.”

“You'll find out soon, calm down.”

You say grabbing her hand and leading her up to the third floor of the astronomy tower, you then let go of Lily’s hand walking in front of the blank wall while Lily looks at you curiously. 

Soon the door for the Room of Requirements appears and the look Lily gives you is priceless.

“Is this the Room of Requirement?”

You nod while opening the door for her.

“Yeah. I found it in my third year. It's my own little part of the school, where no one can bother me unless I let them. You're the first person I've brought here.”

The room is full of books and a big fireplace with large comfy couches and a record player with all your favorite records next to it.

Next to the fireplace is the little picnic you had set up. Lily lets out a soft gasp as she sees the set up.

You both sit down and look at each other for a while. It's a soft moment, it feels like you both just needed to take each other in for a moment.

“So it's your last christmas here. Are you going home?”

You ask, taking a bite of a chocolate wand after.

“No. We all decided to stay here for our last christmas. Are you staying?”

“Yes. I'd rather spend Christmas in the dungeons then go back to Grimmauld Place.”

You say shaking your head with a sigh.

“Y/N, I know you try to avoid talking about this but just hear me out and if you don't want to talk about it after, I will leave it be, okay?”

You sigh already knowing where this conversation is going but you decided to hear Lily out anyway. You nod your head letting her know that she can continue.

“You said it yourself. This is mine and Sirius’s last Christmas at Hogwart. This is probably the last chance the three of you have to spend a Christmas together. They miss you Y/N, honestly they do. My sister doesn't talk to me anymore because I'm a witch and I miss her everyday. I don't want to see you go through that. I don't want you to regret not seeing your brother when you had the chance.”

You take a moment to think about it. You already knew if you didnt make up with them soon you'd regret it. Hell you already regretted it. 

You remembered how heartbroken Narcissa was when she found out that Andromeda had a baby. Narcissa knew she would never be able to meet her niece. You didn't want that. You didn't want your brothers to have families and you not be involved. You knew that if you didnt get over this pettiness that there was a large possibility that that was exactly the path you were heading down. 

“Okay. when everyone leaves tomorrow. I'll see them.”

“Really?”

“Yeah Lils. You're right after all. I don't want to not be a part of my brothers’ lives.”

Lily just gives you a hug whispering how proud of you she was.

Lily understood how hard this was for you. She knew you were hurt even if you never flat out said it to her.But it was time for you to get over it before you lost the only family you ever really cared for.

You and Lily spend the rest of the night talking and laughing. For a moment you forget the anxiety that will consume you tomorrow.

You'll be fine. As long as you have Lily by your side you know you'll be fine.

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

You waited at the entrance of the Gryffindor common room anxiously playing with the ring on your finger.

Why did you agree to this? Were you really ready to face your brothers? What if they hated you? What if they wanted nothing to do with you?

You were so caught up in your thoughts you didn't even notice your favorite red head till she touched your hands stopping you fidgeting with your ring one again.

You looked up at her, the anxiety obvious on your face. 

“They want to see you. I promise.”

She gives you a comforting smile keeping her hand on yours.

“What if I fuck this up? What if I lose them for good?”

You feel the burning behind your eyes trying not to cry.

“They love you so much Y/N. All you have to do is try.”

You nod, keeping Lily’s hand in yours letting her lead you into the portrait of Elizabeth Spriggs aka ‘The Fat Lady’.

Once you walk into the common room you notice it seems uncharacteristically quiet. 

You look and see two matching sets of gray eyes looking at you. You take a deep breath still trying to hold back the tears.

It's been close to a year since you talked to Sirius, quite a few months since you talked to Regulus.   

“Sirius, Regulus.”

You say in a neutral voice not making eye contact with either of them.

There's a moment of silence and stillness, a part of  you considers running out of the room but before you can act on that though you're being tackled into a hug by your eldest brother. You couldn't help but let a few tears fall as you hold Sirius and you can tell he's crying just the same.

Sirius cups your face with both of hands after a few moments to look at you with tears streaming down his face.

“I'm never letting you go again, you hear? I'm not losing my baby sister again.”

You let out a little sob and hug Sirius again putting your head on his chest.

“Sirius, Y/N why don't we go somewhere with a smaller audience.”

Regulus said in all his stoic glory. 

“Yeah. Regs right. We'll go to my room, alright?”

You give a small nod to Sirius then leads you to his shared dorm room while Regulus follows behind. 

You honestly didn't even notice the other people in the room until Regulus said something.

It wasn't many people, it was just ‘The Marauders’ as they call themselves and Lily but Regulus knew you would be more comfortable with just you three and you knew Regulus felt the same.

Once you get to Sirius room you look at Regulus for the first time in months.

“I’m sorry Regulus. I really am.”

You say trying to hold tears back once again.

“You ignored me. You ignored me for months Y/N.”

You look down ashamed playing with your ring once more.

“I know Regulus and if I could go back I would but I can’t. I was just hurt. Sirius left and that hurt so fucking much but at least I had you. Then you left, and I understand why you did but then I was just by myself. It nearly killed me to be alone with mother and father.”

You said taking a deep breath.

“I told you to come with me. Why didn’t you come?”

Regulus said with so much hurt in his voice it felt like someone ripped your heart out.

“I was afraid. I was afraid that I was too much like them. That if I would have gone, I would have tainted whatever good you made for yourselves.”

“You are nothing like them. Neither of you are. I made sure of that. Y/N if you were like them you wouldn’t be friends with Lily and Regulus if you were you would have never reached out for help.”

Sirius says while holding you against him once again.

“I really am sorry Reg.”

You look up at regulus with your tear stained face.

Regulus’s eyes softened and before you knew it, Regulus had taken you from Sirius arms and hugged you tighter than you had ever been hugged before but you didn’t mind.

You both cried into each other's arms for the first time in years. 

Sirius hugged both of you and for a moment you just sat there in your brother's arms enjoying every second of it.

“So, you and Lily huh?”

Sirius says in a teasing voice. You pushed him away and glared at him.

“Shut up.”

You say with a slight pout. Regulus and Sirius just give each other a knowing look as you roll your eyes and scoff.

“I hate you both. Did you know that?”

“Nah, you love us too much baby sister.”

Sirius says ruffling your hair as you swat his hands away.

“Wait. Is that my jumper?”

“… No. You’re crazy. The Black Family Madness is catching up with you Siri.”

Sirius and you start to argue as if no time had passed. Regulus just smiles at you two feeling grateful to have this back.

You spend the rest of the break with your brothers mostly but also with the marauders and Lily.

You got to know them all. 

You took a liking to Remus quickly bonding over your favorite books.

You and Peter got along well enough playing chess together often, since he would insist on rematches because you would continuously beat him.

James admittedly was harder not that you didn’t like him but a part of you had blamed him for Sirius leaving for so long that it was hard to get past that and it showed. It wasn't until christmas eve when James had pulled you aside for a moment when you felt yourself grow comfortable with him.

“You know, you don't have to go back there right?”

“What do you mean Potter?”

You looked at him with raised eyebrows as he sat next to you on the couch you were now occupying. 

“You don't have to go back to Grimmauld Place. You could be with your brothers again, I already wrote mum and dad. They said they'd be more than happy to have another Black join the Potters. I mean what's another one, yeah?”

James said with a small smile, lightly bumping your shoulder with his.

“Are you sure? I don't-”

“Yes. I know. You don't want to over step or be a burden and I know you don't think you deserve it, but you do. Merlin's beard, you and your brother are just the same. I will never understand the treatment your parents put the three of you through. But what I do know is that you three deserve good things in your lives. You deserve so much more than what your parents put you through. You are worth so much more than what they made you believe you were. You deserve to be loved, to be safe and to be happy. Y/N you will always have a home with us, plus… I've always wanted a little sister.”

You didn't say anything, you just hugged James and nodded your head.

Off to the side watching the interaction between you and James was your brothers, for the first time in years Regulus and Sirius knew the three of you would be safe and they couldn't be happier.

They liked seeing you interact with the people that they’ve grown close with and getting to see you actually happy every so often was just a bounce. 

But your brothers weren’t the only ones who liked it. 

Lily loved seeing you interact with all of them. 

You seemed so alive.

She’d never seen you act like that with anyone but her. She loved seeing you smile and laugh. She loved seeing you and your brothers truly happy.

This was her favorite Christmas so far.

You had made it her favorite Christmas.

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

You felt better than you had in months, no, years. 

You had your brothers back and for the first time in years. The three of you were getting along and you knew you would finally be safe.

You also knew it was because of Lily as well. 

She was the fire in your darkness, she gave you light, warmth and she felt so happy and safe.

Everything felt good for once. But if you knew anything, you knew that wasn't going to last.

“You don't actually think she loves you do you?”

You turn to see none other than Severus Snape leaning by the entrance to the dungeons. You raise your eyebrow at him questioningly. 

You don't really talk to Snape unless it was necessary you never really liked him or the company he kept in recent years. So for him to start any conversion with you was rare.

“What are you on about Snape?”

“Lily.”

He states as if it's obvious.

“What about Lily?”

Your interest obviously peaked at hearing the name of your favorite Gryffindor.

“She'll never love you. She loves Potter.”

He says in a monotone voice. You scoff rolling your eyes. 

“I don't know why I'm bothering with this nonsense.”

You turn to walk away muttering to yourself. 

“She and Potter kissed, you know. The other week, at a Hufflepuff party. I saw them. Potter has been pining for Lily since our first year. It seems he finally got what he was after.”

You stood there shocked, confused, frozen with your jaw now clenched. 

That couldn't be true. Lily wouldn't do that and if she did she'd tell you right? I mean you were… whatever you are, right?

And James wouldn't do that. He had all but flat out asked you to be his sister.

Snape was lying, he had to be. He was spreading lies about Lily. He just had to be. You wouldn't stand for that. You felt ‘The Madness’ creep in once again.

In one swift motion you had Snape pinned against the wall with your wand pointed at his neck. 

“You will not speak of Lily again. You will not look at her, speak to her. You will not breathe the same air as her and if you do. I will kill you. Do I make myself clear?”

You say with murderous eyes. 

Snape would never admit it but he was scared. He's only ever seen you as cold, emotionless. This was far from emotionless. 

“Crystal.”

Snape said, trying to hide his emotions as best as he could. 

You walk away without another glance stuck in your head. 

He had to be lying right? But why would he lie? Nothing made sense. Maybe he wasn't lying.

Stupid. You were so fucking stupid.

How could you think someone like Lily Evans would like someone like you. 

Lily brings life to everything she touches, she was sweet, caring, kind she was fucking perfect.

You were a Black, enough said.

You were angry, mean, rude, it was in your blood to ruin everything you touch. 

It wasn't her fault that you thought you might actually have a chance, that you developed a stupid crush, it was your fault for being stupid enough to think that it was ever a possibility.

I mean maybe you and Lily were just friends. Maybe you misunderstood?

You couldn't blame her but that didn't mean it hurt less. 

The first person you started putting your walls down for the first time in years obviously didn't care about you the way you cared for her. 

So you did what you did best when people would hurt you.

You avoided and ignored her. You managed to avoid Lily for a few days skipping potions class, leaving the library when you would see her walk in. 

Sirius was quickly getting irritated with your antics. He had been pestering you as to why you were avoiding Lily but you wouldn’t tell him or Regulus. 

If they knew she would find out.

So you just kept avoiding her and avoiding answering any questions your brothers would ask.

Eventually she found you and tried to talk to you which led to you ignoring her. It killed you to see the look on her face but it was necessary to protect yourself. You tried to convince yourself that it would be easier after a week. 

It wasn't.

For either of you apparently. 

Lily had managed to find you in the library while you were looking for a book to distract yourself with. You had put your guard down for a moment. You didn't even know she was there till she spoke.

“Y/N.”

She had said to gain your attention, when you realized there wasn't anywhere for you to go you decided to just get it over with to stop avoiding your problems for the first time in your life. 

You rolled your eyes and sighed looking at her for the first time in a week.

“What the hell do you want Evens? Shouldn't you be with your boyfriend, Potter?”

You say to Lily in a monotone voice looking her in the eyes.

“What are you talking about? I'm not dating James, I don't want him!”

You felt all the anger and insecurity start to cloud your brain. She was lying. How dare she lie to you. You were damned if you were made a fool once again. 

“You're such a liar Evans. Snape told me everything about how Potter has been pining for you for years! How he saw you two kiss at the Hufflepuff party! I can't believe I was stupid enough to believe you'd actually like me. I can't believe I was stupid enough to think Potter would actually look at me as a sister.”

You whisper yelled with your jaw clenched while the back of your eyes burned trying to hold back tears. 

“Me and James didn’t kiss I swear-”

You scoff, turning to walk away deciding you were done with this conversation, but Lily grabbed you by the arm, tapping you against the bookshelf.

“I didn't kiss James.He's a great friend but nothing more to me, and he does care for you, I know he does. But I don't want him, I want you. I've wanted you since the first time I laid eyes on you. I love everything about you. I love how loyal you are, how even if you didn’t talk to your brother you'd never let anyone speak ill of them. How despite being raised to hate someone like me you never held something as stupid as my blood statutes against me. I love how smart you are. How you cover your smile when you laugh. How your eyes light up when youre reading a book you enjoy. How when you get anxious you play with your ring. Everything. Can’t you see that?”

You searched her eyes trying to see if there was any lie, but all you saw was the truth. She meant every word and it scared you. 

Lily then cupped your cheek wiping away a tear you didn't know was there.

“Why would you want me? I'm cold, rude, cynical and angry all the time. I'm not a great person...”

Lily scoffs playfully while smiling.

“You're no angel but you’re my everything Y/N. To me you light up the room, you don't take shit from anyone, you stand up for what you believe and I hope you'll never change. You showed me that I'm enough. I'll never stop wanting you. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”

Lily whispers the last part brushing her nose against yours.

“What if I hurt you?”

You whisper your voice breaking a little.

“You'll probably hurt me a few times and I'll probably hurt you a few times but that's okay as long as we work it out together, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

The anger and insecurity finally unclouding your brain letting you take in how close you two are. 

Lily's hand is still cupping your cheek while her other hand is on your hip pressing you slightly in the bookshelf while she's pressed against you.

Lily's eyes flicker down to your lips and you nod softly letting her know it was okay. 

You both lean in, your lips touching for the first time.

You felt warmth go through your whole body. It was beyond a spark or fireworks. It felt as if a bomb had been dropped on you. 

That kiss broke something in you. 

But it wasn't bad. 

It had broken down every wall that you spent years building up brick by brick. 

In just a moment Lily Evans had managed to do something to you, that you and so many other people thought impossible. 

She healed a part of you. 

Her lips were so soft they felt like silk against yours. 

It felt like she was made to be with you.

It's soft and sweet, at first. Then it felt consuming. She was all around you and you didn't want it to be any other way. 

You could only feel her, her hand squeezing your hip as your hand was on the back of her head pulling her closer. 

You could only smell her cherry and vanilla perfume. It made you dizzy with how intoxicating it was.

You had forgotten that you were in public for a moment that was until you heard a throat clear. 

Both of you pulling away with hot faces you look to see a very amused and smirking Remus Lupin. 

“Finally. I was afraid neither of you would ever actually make a move. Just wait till Sirius hears about this.”

You groan, throwing your head back against the bookcase while Remus and Lily laugh at your expense. 

You never expected for anyone to be able to break down your walls, to fall for someone. 

Especially not someone like Lily. 

But fuck were you happy that she did.

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳

[just2bubbly]

ok hear me out, 'The Black Dog' is wolfstar coded and not just because of the literal connection with Sirius Black and his animagus but in general. The Dog is very obviously Sirius and the way she goes on building the first verse of long lost friendship and relationship- "I am someone who until recent events shared your secrets with" and that's easy to tell Sirius and Remus were one half of the Marauders and they were friends, lovers and obviously shared everything with each other. The location is the Marauder's Map and it could possibly be a memory that Sirius can't get out of his head while being in Azkaban that relates closely with Remus who is having the same flashback but at a bar or in a deep emotional capacity when he sees a black dog that reminds him of Siri. "She's too young to know this song" is Tonks (no offence to her but ye) the age gap is there, she was there when Sirius was alive and it was a visual representation of Remus choosing her above him. When Remus steals glances at Sirius when he thinks no one is seeing for 'old habits die screaming' and now he doesn't know what to do with this for he feels Sirius is too lost in despair. Post Azkaban Sirius is "moving through the world heartbroken" and with desires of having a friend in Remus if not a lover. "And it kills me, I don't understand"— is very clearly the chaotic mess inside Siri's head as he takes over his life after 13 years of imprisonment. "Now I wanna sell my house, and set fire to all my clothes," is perhaps the disdain with Grimmauld Palace and his past that he tried so hard to escape haunting him like a full circle. "This tail between your legs, you're leaving" is again his untimely death, too soon and a life too short with great regrets and glorious moments.

You can't tell me this song isn't about Sirius Black

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

Blowing Smoke

A Jegulus song lyric one shot. I'm trying a new layout so lmk what you think! Guys this actually came to me like a fever dream.

wc: 1042 // @jegulus-microfic

Regulus isn't stupid. He sees it, all of it. He sees how she looks at James and how James looks back at her. It wasn't enough for him to have Regulus because you always chase the things you only get a taste of. This too, Regulus knows all too well. He stays hidden in the astronomy tower, behind tapestries, and alcoves in the dark. She can be loved out loud, in the common room, in the great hall, in the daylight. Today is the end day. Regulus plays the part of executioner and guilty both. He knows that to love something is to lose it too. That does not make this easier. 

James crashes through the door of the tower, rumpled and blushing. He was always loud, always the centre of attention. His eyes land on Regulus, and just for a second, Regulus stills. He can't keep this, but god, how he wants to. Maybe he never even had it, but there's something there, just not worth playing second for. James carries that boyish smile, the one reserved only for Regulus, but it's too late. A sacrifice is only a sacrifice once the blood is drawn. 

"Tell me, is she prettier than she was on the internet?" Regulus' face shifts into indifference. No preamble, no games. He is still a Black at the end of the day. 

"Reg, what are you talking about?" James shifts uncomfortably. He knew this was coming. Not this soon though, he pleads, not right now. 

"Are your conversations cool, like are you even interested?" Regulus stands, leaning against the railing of the tower. His arms sit crossed over his chest, less to be intimidating, and more to keep his heart where it should be. His tone is light, conversational almost. 

"This is about Lily." James' voice is toneless, his eyes immediately dull. Not now. Not now. 

"Who else, James, who else?" 

In any other scenario, you just might have been able to convince Regulus he was wrong, that James was just trying to protect them both. Maybe he would've believed that a year of hiding was worth it, that kissing in cupboards and avoiding eye contact in the dinner hall was just the way it should be. But Regulus will not be an object of shame outside of his home, he won't drag that ignominy behind him when he doesn't have to. 

"She's my friend." His eyes narrow. "I'm not going to avoid her just because she makes you insecure." James isn't an argumentative person. In fact, he's a talker, a placater, and so he can't quite figure out why defending Lily comes to him so easily. 

"I know what you are, brighter than the stars." Now Regulus' voice is pure mockery, just so he can see how far James flinches. "Did you mean that then?"

"That was a private conversation. Who even told you about that?"

"I don't think me finding out is the issue here."

"She was upset, she's got so much going-"

"And me, James? How much have I got going on?" Now Regulus promised himself to stay put together, but this, this is his frailty. Too emotional, too expressive when it counts the least. "I'm your dirty little secret because Sirius wouldn't be able to handle sharing. I'm one wrong step away from my parents beating me half to death. So tell me." 

"No."

"Tell me what the fuck is so awful in her life you just had to recycle the same line you used on me?"

James is quiet, chest heaving. He can feel curls sticking to the nape of his neck from sweat. How could he choose? How could Regulus make him. The silence was crackling like it was electrified. A blush crept up Regulus' cheeks. He looked younger in that moment, and something tugs at James' chest, but a callow face does not mean weakness. 

"Tell me if she takes you far." And James knows exactly what Regulus means. Even through his derisive tone, Regulus had something that kept James grounded, something that kept him tethered. And he hates it. 

"Far away from you." James is angry now, but he can't quite tell who it's at. "Far enough away from all the baggage you've been carrying." His head is a mess, and the only person who could help won't. Who the fuck does Regulus think he is? What the fuck has he done?

"My baggage? Oh, you're funny, Potter. Go on, run away again." Regulus' tone is harsh, derisive. "Up another hill to all the girls who'll help you bury it."

"Oh, fuck off Regulus. Back to surnames? Really? Can't we just talk?"

"About what? The lying? The running? The hiding? No, we can't fucking talk. Grow up."

"Baby Black, so insecure, so naive." James' words are trite to Regulus. "And the girls? What fucking girls? How could I when you're always just behind me?"

"Apparently that still didn't stop you." A flicker of hurt runs through Regulus, but he tamps it down. 

"You know nothing about me. You don't understand. I have a reputation. Everyone thinks I'm single, and Lily's just there. What do you want me to do when I'm constantly pushed in her way?" James is bright red and the air is cloying. His head is buzzing, and he just wants it to stop. "Everyone expects me to be put together, to get the girl, to be cool and funny, and attractive. I thought you'd get it."

"They're just blowing smoke," Regulus smiles, except it's not a smile at all. "I'll say what they won't." It's a realisation. Regulus knows that despite everything, despite being James' dirty little secret, he still has one thing James doesn't. 

James told Regulus the truth, everything. Every false laugh. Every tired smile. Every sleepless night. 

And James knows it too. 

"Reg, wait. Stop. Please." His hand reaches for Regulus, but he just misses, brushing the cuff of his jumper. 

"I know everything they don't." Regulus' footsteps echo all the way down the stairs. 

And for the first time in his life, James feels something bubbling up in his chest. A subtle burning that felt like agony. 

For the first time in his life, James Potter couldn't have the thing he wanted most.

[lovetaylorrussellgrr]

am i the only one who is obsessed with fics based on songs lmao cuz listening to music and reading the fic inspired from it its just fun

[hotteststar]

"When I see the way you act

wondering when I'm coming back

I could do about anything

I could even learn how to love like you"

(by Rebecca Sugar)

except that it's reg in the afterlife who left for the horcrux mission without telling james who is waiting for him to come home

[starkeycore]

Stargirl Interlude (Song fic)

Warning: Smut, 18+, Edging, Teasing Sitting on the countertop with my legs wrapped tightly around your waist, I moan as you pump your cock in and out of me. A squelching sound vibrates through the kitchen in addition to your labored groans and your hips coming in contact with mine. I cry out as I grip the ragged edge of the countertop, my nail catching on a splinter, but I’m too consumed by the pleasure to process the pain. My arms fly to wrap around your torso using them and my legs to pull you closer, arching my back, causing your chest to be flush against my own. I moan your name as I feel you hit a deeper spot inside of me. ““F-Fred I’m close” my eyes squeeze tight as my legs begin to shake. “Not yet.” you say lowly as tears slip out my eyes, and you reach up to gently wipe them away. “Feels so good” I moan, choking on my words. I begin to babble incoherent moans of pleasure, you lean down to kiss and suck my already bruised neck with a smirk on your face. “I can’t hold it, I’m so close, so close, I’m gonna… fuck” I whisper as my body shakes violently in an attempt to hold back my orgasm. You pull away from my neck and grab ahold of it before bringing your lips to mine, swallowing my moans delightfully. I can feel your pulse quicken against my chest as your dick twitches inside of me. “Cum” you say shortly, that's all I need to hear before I let go, moaning as my juices cover your cock pulses against my walls. Warm liquid floods my core deliciously and your thrusts slow as you ride out both of our orgasms. You move your hand from my neck and to my face and wipe away the remnants of my tears, placing a kiss on my temple. “It’s okay, you're okay” you say softly, placing a hand on my back, rubbing it soothingly.

[theonceandfuturequeenoftarts]

I need a messy tomarry fic with a plot based on Obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo. Tom and Ginny used to date but broke up, and now Ginny's dating Harry. Except Harry keeps thinking about Tom (when he's on dates with and sleeping with and fucking Ginny), and he thinks it's because he's jealous and weird and has issues (true), but he really loves Ginny.

But what's really happening is Harry is obsessed with Tom and unintentionally using Ginny to get stories about Tom and fantasizing about the other man to near-stalker levels.

Is Tom also obsessed? Does he realize Harry exists?

(Ginny obviously dumps Harry eventually because she deserves better and Harry needs a clue-by-four to the head.)

[mrsriddles-blog]

Nightmare | M.R

Pairing: Slytherin Fem Reader X Mattheo Riddle

WC: 3.5K

Warnings/Notes: Mild Language, Violence, Implied Smut, Angst, etc.

Summary: Mattheo has developed an infatuation with you, the schools notorious badass.

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

If I shall die before I ‘wake

I pray the Lord my soul to take

No one truly understood how Mattheo Riddle—the playboy of the school who suddenly wasn’t playing around anymore—was infatuated with Y/n Y/l/n. She was a girl that not many people wanted to mess around with. She had no problem calling people out on their bullshit, nor did she have a problem being honest—brutally honest.

She had the mouth of a sailor and she was as crude as the guys at the school. She hardly put up with any girls just because she didn’t want anything to do with drama. However, her best girl friend is Pansy Parkinson. When the two were together, everyone knew to steer clear. The two were batshit crazy and was ready to cause havoc.

“Hey babes.” Pansy said, playing with Enzo’s hair.

Everyone sat around the tree as usual as you arrived with a cigarette hanging out of your mouth. You had a new display of bruises on your face, your knuckles bruised and battered. Mattheo eyed you with eyes that Tom teased him about being dreamy looking.

“Hey babe.” You say, taking a seat and leaning back.

“Nasty bruise there.” She teases.

“Granger doesn’t know when enough is enough.” You chuckle, pushing your hair out of your eyes.

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize

I’ve tasted blood and it is sweet

I’ve had the rug pulled beneath my feet

I’ve trusted lies and trusted men

Broke down and put myself back together again

Stared in the mirror and punched it to shatters

Collected the pieces and picked out a dagger

I’ve pinched my skin in between my two fingers

And wished I could cut some parts off with some scissors

“Oi! Y/l/n!” Harry exclaims, striding towards you.

You take another puff out of your cigarette, looking up at him unamused as you blow out the puff of smoke in his general direction. He steps back, looking disgusted before focusing back on you. You smile lazily at him.

“What ever do you want, Potter?” You ask sarcastically.

“I want to know why you beat up Hermione.” He demands.

“Well she started it. I ended it.” You say.

“I want a real answer.” He snaps.

You had just walked into the bathroom, opening one of the windows to try and sneak in a quick smoke real quick. Hermione walks in and scoffs when she sees you. You look at her blankly.

“C’mon, give me a smile, Y/l/n.” She mocks, giving you a nasty onceover.

“I don’t owe you a goodman thing. Turn around and leave me alone.” You snap, taking another puff from your cigarette.

“I didn’t think you were a coward. Last I heard, you got into fights and won them. Scared to lose?” She asks.

“How about you shut your mouth before you see where running it gets you.” You suggest, putting out the cigarette and throwing it out the window.

“I told you, Potter. She started it. Maybe you should tell your little bitch to watch who she runs her mouth to next time. I gave her a warning. But, she kept pushing. She was quite determined she’d win the fight. Called me a coward. You should've seen the way she cowardly hid in the corner of the bathroom to get away.” You say, scoffing out a laugh at the memory.

“Come on, little lady, give us a smile.”

No, I ain’t got nothin’ to smile about

I got no one to smile for, I waited a while for

A moment to say I don’t owe you a goddamn thing

“God, you are pathetic. What? You can’t find happiness in your screwed up homelife and among your friends, that you have to hurt other people?” He asks.

“I don’t hurt people without reason. And you know nothing about me.” You spat.

He stared at you a moment, before turning and striding away. He didn’t want to push anymore than he had as he didn’t want to be your next victim.

You watch him with narrowed eyes and a clenched jaw. You resisted the urge to hex him or worse, curse him. You looked like a daydream to everyone, but really you were a nightmare.

No one truly knew where the change came. You were sweet and innocent once. They wished they could blame your friend group, but you were friends with them before. You came back from summer holidays your third year with a whole different personality. Little did they know, your parents were murdered by a rich wizard who got away with it.

Everything changed for the worst, or maybe the best for some.

Voldemort sought you out after hearing the news from his twin sons. He took you in and began to teach you his ways. You became a Deatheater just like your parents and all your friends. You have became the reason everyone was far more confident that they were going to win the war too. You were calculated, yet when needed you were merciless.

I, I keep the record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize

I’m no sweet dream, but I’m a hell of a night

That I’m no sweet dream, but I am a hell of a night

“Y/n/n, I’m delighted you are here for the holidays.” Voldemort says, standing to greet you with a hug.

“Thank you for having me, my lord.” You murmur.

“Of course. Why don’t you go get settled in? Dinner will be done around six.” He says.

“Of course.” You murmur.

Mattheo and Tom waited in the doorway for you. You walked towards them, before pausing as the hairs on your neck stood up. You felt your stomach flip uncomfortably.

“Y/n/n?” Mattheo questions.

“Someone is here. Someone who shouldn’t be here.” You murmur, striding past them as you pull your wand free.

You followed your gut and headed to the basement. You heard Tom and Mattheo behind you as Bellatrix’s cackling from upstairs could be heard. You hear Hermione scream, but you keep going when you see a familiar brunette boy and ginger-head boy.

“Potter! Weasley! What the hell are you doing here?” You snap, pointing your wand at them.

Mattheo and Tom follow in suit, Mattheo distracted as he watched you with awe. Tom rolled his eyes at his brother who was obsessed with you.

“Y/l/n? You are a part of this too?” Harry asks in disbelief.

“Of course she is. She hangs with those snakes too. Not to mention she is a snake herself.” Ron spats.

“What is happening to Hermione?” Harry asks.

“What she deserves for breaking in. What you two will soon face as well. You get a first-hand experience of a snake bite. You get to see how venomous we truly are.” You say, smiling sweetly at the two.

No, I won’t smile, but I’ll show you my teeth

And I’ma let you speak if you just let me breathe

I’ve been polite, but won’t be caught dead

Lettin’ a man tell me what I should do in my bed

Keep my exes in check in my basement

‘Cause kindness is weakness, or worse, you’re complacent

I could play nice or I could be a bully

I’m tired and angry, but somebody should be

Harry eyes you warily, looking between you three. He knew the odds, but he also wasn’t one to go down without a fight. He reached for his wand , but it was to late as you hit him with Cruciatus Curse.

“What are you doing!?” Ron cries, dropping to his knees as he tried to get Harry’s attention.

“Protecting my family.” You spat.

“They are just using you.” Ron says, shaking his head.

“Imperio.” You say, watching him curiously.

“Mattheo, lets grab Potter.” Tom says.

“Ron, keep quiet. Give me your wand and Harry’s wand and follow me.” You say.

Ron hands both wands over as he follows you upstairs. Hermione was tied to a chair now, your eyes falling on the word carved into her arm. Tom and Mattheo struggle to lay an unconscious Harry on the ground.

“Is he dead?” Voldmort questions.

“No, my lord. He is unconscious. I used the Cruciatus Curse on him. I used the Imperius Curse on Ron. They were both in the basement.” You explain.

“Well done, child. The rest are on their way. They should be here any minute.” He says.

You nod, turning to help Tom and Mattheo with tying up Harry in a chair as you hear quiet chatter heading towards the dining room. You tell Ron to sit and you easily tie him up as your friends and their parents enter.

“We had our lovely trio break in, and what for…I don’t know just yet.” Voldemort announces, motioning everyone to take a seat.

You take a seat next to Mattheo, your hands shaky with nerves. He grabs your hand under the table, squeezing it out of comfort. You squeeze back, especially as scarlet red eyes focus on you.

“Question the boy.” He orders.

“Ron, why did you guys break in?” You ask, trying not to show your nerves.

“H-Horcruxes.” He stutters out, trying to fight your hold on him.

“Ron! Fight it! You're stronger than this!” Hermione cries.

“Zip it! Or we might have to repeat what happened a few minutes ago, mudblood.” Bellatrix spats, glaring at Hermione.

“Are you delusional? You three are always up to something, but walking into the snakes den? You truly are arrogant fools.” Tom spats, shaking his head.

“Mattheo, Tom, Y/n/n, you are dismissed. You’ve all proved your worthiness today. Why don’t you two assist Y/n/n with what she might need for the spell she has been working on?” Voldemort suggests.

The three of you stand, leaving the room before Hermione says your name. You stop in the doorway before turning to look back at her.

“Why? Why do this? Why are you on their side? What happened to you? We use to be friends. What changed? Why did you come back somebody else our third year?” She asks, tears in her eyes.

“That Y/n is dead, Granger. She isn’t coming back. She died the day my parents were murdered by a rich wizard. Yet, the Ministry of Magic defended him and let him walk free—a mudblood. He should be rotting in Azkaban.” You spat, your eyes narrowing on her.

This was the first time most of your friends knew of what happened to your parents. They assumed they died, but they didn’t ever pry.

“Come on, little lady, give us a smile”

No, I ain’t got nothin’ to smile about

I got no one to smile for, I waited a while for

A moment to say I don’t owe you a goddamn thing

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize

“Matty, can I steal one of your jumpers?” You ask, walking into his room.

“Yeah, here.” He says, handing you the one he had been wearing earlier today.

“Thank you.” You say, smiling at him before pulling it on.

He has definitely imagined you in his clothes. He was beyond obsessed. He practically watched your every move when he was in your presence. He imagined a lot of things. He imagined what it would be like to hold you…to kiss you…to see you in his clothes…to see you without clothes. To say the least, he had a very imaginative imagination.

“Are you busy right now?” He asks.

“No. I just wrapped up the loose ends to that spell for your father. So, I should have a lot of free time on my hands now.” You say, sitting at the end of his bed.

“Let’s watch a film then.” He suggests.

“Not some horror flick though.” You plead.

“No, no, not a horror flick. Why don’t you pick?” He suggests.

You smile, shrugging as you nod. He pats the spot behind him and you crawl up the bed before plopping beside him. He scoots closer to you nonchalantly as he hands you the remote to his TV. You pick a romance movie, hoping he doesn’t make fun of you.

Half an hour passes, and Mattheo had gotten pretty invested in the movie. However, that was until you had moved so you were laying down beside him. Now, he found himself watching you when you got drawn in by the movie. He didn’t think it was this fair to look so good in his bed, but you looked like a Goddess in his eyes.

“Y/n/n.” He murmurs, leaning over you a bit, looking down at you.

Your eyes flicker to his, seeing how close he really was to you. Your lips part in surprise, his eyes flickering to them. You look at his lips, watching them move closer and closer. You close your eyes, his lips dancing with yours.

You move a hand to his, pushing his head closer to yours as he straddles you, deepening the kiss. You both never thought a kiss could be so perfect and magical.

“Y/n.” He whispers against your lips, his eyes still closed.

“Matty, I need you.” You whisper, looking up at him with flushed cheeks.

“Shit…are you sure about this baby?” He asks.

“More than sure.” You whisper.

“Draco, come.” Voldemort says.

You hold Mattheo’s hand tighter, praying Draco comes to you all. It was a relief as he walked over to the Deatheaters side. You’ve noticed he was a little torn between what side he wanted to be on.

“Y/n, now.” Voldemort says, turning to you.

Harry Potter was officially dead. You confirmed it. Now, it was time for the big unveiling of Voldemort’s human form, and not his form that represents where things had gone wrong. It was time for him to be the form of utmost perfection. You found yourself wondering if he’ll look like Tom. Tom does happen to resemble his father a lot from some pictures you’ve seen.

You take in a breath, squeezing Mattheo’s hand before letting it go. You step forward, closing your eyes as you let your arms go out. You hear startled and surprised gasps from everyone around as you begin to float up off the ground.

Mattheo watched just as everyone else was surprised as a green light emitted from you before becoming so bright and engulfing you. He looks back at you after the light explodes and he sees that you're dressed in a black cloak, but he sees the dark green bodice underneath it. Your eyes open and he stumbles back when he sees your eyes are green.

Someone like me can be a real nightmare, completely aware

But I’d rather be a real nightmare than die unaware, yeah

Someone like me can be a real nightmare, completely aware

But I’m glad to be a real nightmare, so save me your prayers

You lift a hand, muttering incoherently before a green tendril reaches out towards Voldemort. It wraps around him, covering him before it slowly washes away as you lower yourself to the ground. You watch, hoping to the gods above that you didn’t just embarrass him. He’d kill you and you knew that.

Your lips part in surprise as you see the man who stood there now. He stood about 6”3 tall, he was lanky yet muscular. His face was sculpted, electric blue eyes instead of scarlet red ones. He had dark brunette hair that was neatly styled and he wore a white button up shirt with black dress pants.

“Your dad is hot.” You mumble and Mattheo pinches you, pouting at you.

“Hey, your mine.” He grumbles.

“I was just noting the obvious.” You mumble.

Voldemort smirks, slowly looking around the crowd. He looks at you and winks before turning to address the other side. You look at Mattheo with wide eyes and parted lips.

“He’s so hot. I really expected he would look like how he had. Like our Tom, now. Not that you're not hot Tom, because you are, like, really hot. But, it seems like even though he hasn’t been his natural self in a long while…he still matured.” You mumble.

“Uhh…thanks I guess.” Tom mumbles.

“You are my bloody girlfriend. Please stop saying my dad is hot.” Mattheo grumbles.

“I’m trying! I’m sorry! I love you.” You say.

“Right.” He grumbles.

You hug him tightly and pout when he doesn’t hug you back. You stand on your tippy toes, your lips brushing against his ear.

“How about I show you how much I love you tonight? I’ve got this new pair of lingerie that I bought because I was thinking of you.” You whisper.

“Deal.” He rasps, kissing your neck before letting you go.

You turn to face Voldemort again. The other side has kneeled and are vowing their loyalty to him. He has them one by one approach him as he gives them the Deatheater mark. Your eyes find Althea, a first year who was looking at you with tears in her eyes. She runs to you, Voldemort watching with curiosity. Your own eyes well, not expecting her to be here.

“When did you get here? I thought I lost you.” You ask, kneeling in front of you as you grab her face in your hands.

“The Ministry of Magic had me at some secure location. They were going to use me as leverage against you when the time come. They had a prophecy that showed who you become. But, you all destroyed the Ministry of Magic. I escaped, “transferred” to Hogwarts in hopes that you’d be here. And you are.” She says, tears falling down her cheeks.

“Oh babes, I am so, so happy you're safe and here. I’ve looked for you, but I honestly thought…I thought they killed you. I couldn’t feel you.” You say, tears falling down your own cheeks.

“They used a spell so you couldn’t feel me. They wanted you to think I was dead…but I’m here. I’m here now.” She whispers, hugging you tightly.

You hug her back tightly, burying your face in her neck as you try to get a grip on your emotions. You lean back, gently wiping her tears away before wiping your own and you smile at her softly.

“Who is this?” Voldemort asks, stopping behind Althea.

You stand, putting an arm around your sister’s shoulder. You look at him and smile slightly.

“This is my sister, Althea. I thought she died…but I guess the Ministry of Magic has had her hidden all along. They had some prophecy about me so they were going to use her as leverage against me. But, because of what you’ve done for us and you’ve taken down the Ministry of Magic…she escaped. Thank you, my lord.” You say.

“Y/n/n…it’s time you called me father or dad. I’ve considered you a daughter for awhile…especially after all you’ve done for our family…and now you and Mattheo are in love…I simply think it’s time for you to stop calling me ‘my lord’ or ‘Voldemort’ and called me dad or something. Althea…I am Tom Marvolo Riddle.” He says, putting a hand out for her to shake.

She takes his hand, shaking it as Tom mumbles something about his name being the same as his fathers. Voldemort takes a knee in front of Althea and smiles at her.

“What should I call you?” She asks.

“Dad…call me dad.” He mumbles.

You smile slightly, realizing that he had a connection to your little sister. You knew he looked at her like a daughter as well. But, this was different. You knew these two were going to have a special bond. You look over at Tom and Mattheo to see them watching with small smiles.

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it ever time

And I realize

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize

I’m no sweet dream, but I’m a hell of a night

That I’m no sweet dream, but I’m a hell of a night.

[morticianesbit]

Severus, Why Didn't You Come ?

Severus Snape x Sirius Black

Severus and Sirius have a secret relationship during the wizarding war. With unspoken problems, feelings are complicated.

~*~

Besides your house walks a young man. He waits underneath the streetlight beneath your window. You told him you’d come, but you never did. 

You like the tattoos on his arms. You like his strong grip in your palm. You like the cheeky smile when you scold him. So tell me Severus, why did you not come ? 

Cruel days inscribed on school desks. The first time you liked the way his hair complemented his face, he shoved you hard against the trunk of a Scots pine. Is that what you see when you see him waiting underneath the streetlight? 

He leans his head against the pole. The metal provides the only coolness on this hot summer’s night. The clock strikes three, he’s been there for two. His friends don’t know about the pain in his heart. The last time he saw you was underneath the bar lights. You were tired and worn. He told the bar man. The meeting was set. All you had to do was come, but you were already gone. 

As he stands beneath the lights on a moonless night. He wonders if you’re mad. He’d be glad if it’s not because he’s Sirius Black. Oh Severus, why didn’t you come ? 

Nineteen-year-old men on the battlefield. Tired eyes and fearful dreams. Friend’s drifting away. The sea’s made of tears. Late night strolls to the local bar. Notes on coasters. His name was Star and your name was Prince. 

He made you smile. The fearlessness in his lines. The world is the place where he played. You fell for the star. He waited for his prince. 

The meeting was set, eleven o’clock at the bar. Tired old man, secret couples slow dancing, glum was the bar you arrived at. You saw your star sitting on your barstool. He saw his prince. You froze in horror. The barman pulled the fists apart. He threw you both on the sidewalk. Heartbreak was the fallout. 

You walked home bloody and bruised. With the pain of a broken heart. The same pain you feel when you see him underneath the streetlight. Perhaps you ask yourself: Severus, why didn’t you come? 

Two weeks before today. A meeting was set at dawn. The days were getting hard. You could not handle the things going down under the order of the dark lord. You needed your lover’s arms, his smile, his kiss. You saw him sitting on the barstool. Happy to see your lover, you made your way to the bar. Then you saw them. The two men hiding at the back of the bar. 

Cruel days on school desks came back. At the sight of James and Lupin, your lover became Sirius Black. You left before someone could drink their first drink. 

He didn’t know about the friends in the back. He didn’t know about the conflict in your heart. All you two ever did was run. Previous sorrows unspoken. Only running for that happy rush. 

Sirius remembers the week after the first meeting. The wounds were charmed away. But there are no charms for the blues of the heart. He was alone. The kitchen light was flickering. His best friend just got married. He drank a cup of tea. Peter walked in. He was disheveled. His cheeks were rosy and there is a love bite on his neck. Eyes wide, he saw Sirius Black. “Don’t tell! It’s not serious. She’s actually with some else.” 

He nodded and that was the end of it. But Sirius understood that he could keep secrets too. Dirty little secrets.

No strings attached. Hot kisses underneath shallow lights. Hot nights in unknown rooms. But he never asked why Severus said yes. 

Slow dancing under unlit lights. Letters written until their muscles cried. Peaceful evenings in each other’s arms. They became each other’s lifelines. No one knew, not even these two lovers. 

Sirius saw Severus’ mark. Severus saw the patronuses. Both knew, but they never confided. Fights in the middle of the night. Angry sex that blew their minds. They always talked, but never about the most important talk. 

Perhaps Sirius should be happy if the reason why Severus never came was because he’s Sirius Black. Not because of the beliefs that separate their story arcs. 

Besides your house, there is a streetlight your lover is under. Daybreak comes and Severus sees the wavy curls lit by the light. Sirius leaves, head low and body hunched. He leaves with one question: Severus, why didn’t you come ? 

As you look at the figure moving further away. Perhaps you wonder about it yourself. Severus, why didn’t you come ? 

[luizd3ad]

Amnesia | Regulus Black x Reader

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ࣪˖⤷ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ ࣪ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ˖ ⤷

Pairing: Regulus Black x GN!Reader

WC: 666

CW: Angst, talks of break up, not being able to move on, all through Regulus POV, no use of Y/N

Author's Note: honestly I only wrote this bc I wanted to wright something inspired by 5SOS 😭

Summary: Regulus is still dealing with the effects of your break up over a year later.

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“It's over, Regulus. I can't do this anymore. You don't talk to me anymore, I'm done.”

Your words play over and over in his head, on a constant loop. 

He remembers the day you left, the tears streaming down your face. The look of pure defeat. He felt as if he had broken a part of you and it killed him.

He doesn't know why he did it still, why he started to shut down with you. He just felt like if he told you his thoughts that you'd eventually leave him. 

That you'd get tired of him and his anxieties, that maybe he would start to bore you.

He still doesn't understand why he thought that especially when you never said or did anything to make him think those things.

Even when you sat there cried and begged him for months to let you in, Regulus just couldn't. He didn't know why he was scared, you had been together for years. He didn't understand why all of the sudden he couldn't talk to you.

He looked around the flat that you had shared. He hasn't changed anything since you left. 

It had been over a year but he couldn't bring himself to move to a new flat or change anything about the space you both had occupied. 

Regulus liked having reminders that you were once there. The pictures of the two of you that still remain on the walls, along with some of the decor that you two had picked out. 

He likes looking at them, he likes feeling the loneliness that they brought him, it reminded him that you're real. 

Sirius would come over often trying to get him to go out to the pubs to ‘get out there’ and try and ‘move on’ but Regulus doesn't want to move on. 

He wants this last year to be a dream.

He wants to wake up and feel you in his arms, so he could just hold you and never let you go.

Regulus had asked Barty and Evan frequently how you are, if there's anything new in your life. 

But he stopped asking three months ago, after they told him you had moved on. That you had been on a few dates with someone and you had made it official. 

You were doing fine. 

How could you be fine? How could you be okay? You had loved him, right? If all the dreams and promises that you left behind were real then how could you be fine?

Especially when he felt like he couldn't breathe anymore without you.

He'd catch himself thinking about you and your new partner. 

He wondered if you were happy. If you ever felt lonely like him. If whenever you and your new partner got into fights would you read the poems and letters he had written for you over the years. 

Do you even have them still? Or are they like your relationship with him? Gone.

Regulus liked thinking about the last kiss you had shared. How soft and beautiful it was.

He missed the way that it felt like you consumed him when you kissed. How he could only smell, taste and feel you. 

When you would kiss, nothing else mattered. There was nothing else, nobody else on this plant, in this universe, time would stop when you were together.

Regulus was pulled out of his thoughts when there was a knock on the door. 

He sighed and stood up figuring it was either Sirius or Barty coming to check on him so he didn't care how he looked. 

He probably needed to shave and get a haircut. He was still in his pajamas even though it was the middle of the day but he just could bring himself to really care.

Regulus opened the door and when he saw who it was he felt like all the air had left his lungs and he wished he had cared what he looked like a second ago.

“Hi, Reg.”

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Lie to me (alt sad ending)

Lover of mine (alt happy ending)